A Community United

At the VIP pre-show party. In attendance (foreground hand on chin) is Art Zulick who was one of the candidates of the “destined to be doomed” judge’s race.
Bob Dorough’s set with an all-star cast of back-up singers.

In short, the live show was awesome. Each act was electrifying, and were ready to bring the house down at any given second.

They were initially worried about the weather and attendance, yet it was BEYOND standing room only. A success past anything the planners had conceived.

State Rep. Kelly Lewis handed out citations (the good kind) to all of the sponsors who made “The Reasons for Christmas Project” possible. (Tonight’s performance was courtesy of Aventis Pasteur).

Before presenting Hillside Inn owner, Judge Murray with his citation, Rep Lewis went into the Hillside Inn’s incredible 50 year history:

It was founded as a minority-owned establishment, back in a time where Blacks and Jews weren’t welcome anywhere else in the Poconos (why anyone would want to be Black or a Jew in the 50’s is beyond me.). It became a non-smoking facility after the Judge’s wife, Odetta, passed away from lung cancer.

The Judge’s acceptance speech, which ended with “I accepted you, and you all accepted me”, drew the crowd to a standing ovation.
Continue reading “A Community United”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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The Rat Bastard factor (redux)

** UPDATE: Dec 11th – UH OH! Mark got FARKED-UP! (Hat tip: Kathy K) **

Or perhaps this should be aptly titled “How to wreck your career in one night”

Remember my little rant “The Rat Bastard Factor“?
Well, the tale gets better…

Pazuhanich Charged With Indecent Assault
“Charges have been filed against Monroe County District Attorney Mark Pazuhanich. Now police have issued a warrant for his arrest… Pazuhanich is now charged with four counts, including indecent assault, putting a child in danger and corruption of a minor. ”

In laymen’s terms: He allegedly fondled his own daughter, and was seen by a security guard and a concerned mother, doing it at the Hilary Duff concert last Saturday in Wilkes Barre.

Yes, ladies and gentlemen… welcome to my world.
Only in the Poconos can you get a District Attorney, who was best known for:
Continue reading “The Rat Bastard factor (redux)”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Other than that, how was the Hilary Duff concert?

It states, quite clearly, in the Internet Superhero Code of Ethics & Conduct, section four, subsection 16D:

“Members are strictly forbidden to mock, laugh, gloat, or otherwide partake in joyous behaviour at the misery of a nemesis found in a twisted situation of extreme karmic proportions.”
Continue reading “Other than that, how was the Hilary Duff concert?”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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2Tag: Murdered by poachers

We always prepare ourselves when hunting season begins every year. Prepared for the inevitability when 2-Tag would never come back home again.

Baby cubs, two summers agoHe was named 2-Tag when he was a frightened little cub two years ago, separated from his mommy and caught in a bear trap. When the game warden tagged him, he didn’t realize he was already tagged in the other ear.

He was sent off several times deep into the woods hundreds of miles away. He always made his way back home. Where he belongs.

He stayed here with us in the community as our playful 300 lb “problem child”, terrorizing the dumpsters every morning looking for breakfast.
Continue reading “2Tag: Murdered by poachers”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Last night at Tamiment

The Reception hall

Last night the Tribe called Brooks attended a rather fancy soiree here in the community. It was a little over the top for a “Sweet 16” party for my taste… but it was very nice, elegant, and well worth the million-billion dollars it cost to pull it off.

But that’s not what this post is about.
Continue reading “Last night at Tamiment”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Murdering cranky neighbors now legal in Galveston

Durst not guilty in neighbor’s murder

I knew something was up when the jurors were taking too long to deliberate.

Sure he admitted to killing Morris Black, and chopping up his body in a blind panic…

Obviously this was a case of a very cocky prosecutor’s office, who was sure they were getting him on 1st degree murder and didn’t bother charging him with anything else.

Johnny Cochran, Robert Shapiro and O.J. Simpson were unavailable for comment at the time of this post.

However, with the strange dissappearance of his wife in 1982, and being a suspect of two murders in California… I somehow don’t think we’ll be hearing the last of Robert Durst.

God, I hope he doesn’t move to the Poconos.
I sleep with one eye open as it is.

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Election aftermath

Ahh… the people have spoken.

And they are truly idiots.
However, it’s all about choice. That’s what makes America great, right?
Even if dark days, a lot of despair, doom & gloom are ahead of us. And you just gave the enemies the keys to the kingdom. Hey, that’s cool.

You did your civic duty and got out there to vote, and I’m damn proud of you.
Continue reading “Election aftermath”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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The Rat Bastard factor

SoApBoXAhhh… it’s election time.
(Yes, for those of you fruity flag-waving patriotic nuts that only tuned in to world events and politics in the past two years… it happens more than every four years, you know.)

You can always tell the Democrats from the Republican candidates. The Republicans hand out candy and toys to the kids, while the Democrats hand out pencils and emery boards.

EMERY BOARDS??!!???

I’ve come to the conclusion that I need to throw my hat in the political arena. I have to run for something. I just have no idea what. And I’m sure no major party would be insane enough to have me on board. But I need to show these people how it’s done.

You see, it’s not about the issues. Nobody gives a flying fuck about “the issues”. Most people don’t even know what “the issues” even are! You’re gonna take care of it. That’s all they need to know.

You tell everyone you’ll never raise their taxes, and make sure your name is etched on everyone’s brain when they get to the voting booth… and you’re IN LIKE FLYNN.

Simple.

Some sure fire ways to do that is:
* Pass out rolls of toilet paper with your opponent’s name printed on it. (Do I really need to explain that one?)
* Screw emery boards. If you’re going to give out something to get the female vote, make it something they can really use… TAMPONS

I’ll have my name on it too. Embossed with raised letters in ALL CAPS on the top of every applicator.

Win or lose, I’ll have something to brag about for years to come.

< ?include("http://www.ericbrooks.com/soapbox/spoofads/random.php");?>

* For the male (and even more female) votes… I would blow most of the campaign money in bars buying everyone drinks. HOW COULD YOU NOT VOTE FOR ME AFTER THAT???

* At debates and forums, dance over “the issues” in your rebuttal by saying “Well at least I didn’t… [insert things your private detective dug up about your opponent here]…”. Counter his boring proposal chart with a huge photo of him done up as a clown, or better yet, Dorothy from the Wizard of Oz.

NOTE: While humiliation and mudslinging is important in every campaign (not to mention my fort�), this can backfire as you want people to remember *YOU* at the polls, not the sap who was stupid enough to oppose you. Moderation and self-control is your friend.

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
I’m very nervously watching the judge’s race this year. Primarily, it will handle family court (custody cases, child welfare, etc.). I’m not going to name names, but it’s one of those “OH NO! NOT HIM!! ANYONE BUT HIM!!!” kind of races. In light of recent events, I probably shouldn’t even be writing this post.

It kind of cracks me up to read on another candidate’s site where he lists charts based on experience, qualifications and integrity. On the “integrity” one, Mr. “prosecutorial misconduct” scored so low, I wondered why there wasn’t a “rat bastard” level on the chart.

Well, no matter what, I can thank God I no longer live in that county. If the aforementioned candidate gets on the bench, and CP$ is knocking on your door…

…you may as well pack your kids stuff, kiss them goodbye, and prepare them for a life of physical and sexual abuse in foster care now.

That candidate has the best chance of winning, by the way.

Tuesday will settle my theory, once and for all, that “there’s no such thing as bad press.”

Jennifer Wise*sigh*

EricBrooks.Com� – Who STILL thinks Jennifer Wise would look REALLY HOT in a judge’s robe. What do you think?

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Pocono Web Designers

*** If you’re coming here from a web search, you can see my Web Design section & references here. ***
-=e=-

Hmmm… I just did a search on “Pocono Web Designers” and found I’m only ranking #4 on MSN Search, and #22 on Google (well, I show up a little earlier on the list, but it’s work-related.)

This disturbs me, as once upon a time I was king of all I surveyed.

Three years ago, three sites I made were the #1, 2, & 3 search results for “Homes in the Poconos” (Which of course drew a lot of traffic and leads from New York City)… now I see only one is hanging in at #8. (and that site is long gone.).

See, I know all the tricks, and the places to go for search engine placement and submission. I’ll be more that happy to share some of my secrets. Privately. Nothing I would publish publicly, or all of the other pocono web designers will do it.

The one trick I can share is using the words you want to be found for (Like “Pocono Web Designers”, for example)… on a page that is constantly updated and kept fresh will definitely advance your placement.

I certainly hope you folks don’t think that’s what I’m up to here, with my constant reference to Pocono Web Designers over and over in this post.

I’m not saying that I’m not.

I just don’t want you to think it, that’s all. :0)

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Dial "D" for "Durst"

He kinda looks like "Mr. Roper" in this pic, doesn't he?

Murder defendant Robert Durst has a light moment during a break in his trial in Galveston, Texas, Monday, Sept. 22, 2003. Durst is accused of killing his neighbor Morris Black, then dismembering the body and throwing body pieces into Galveston Bay in September 2001. (AP Photo/LM Otero)

I’ve been getting a lot of search engine activity on “ROBERT DURST” lately. Of course it’s no small wonder as it’s front page news in NYC, PA and Texas. For the loose stragglers on the web, let me get you up to speed:

Readers Digest version: After his wife’s disappearance, Millionaire New York Real Estate heir Robert Durst flees the unwanted media attention, posing himself as a mute elderly woman. Becomes a suspect as neighbor Morris Black’s body parts are found floating in Galveston Bay. After jumping bail, Durst is arrested for shoplifting in Pennsylvania six weeks later.
Continue reading “Dial "D" for "Durst"”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Stress-Man hits the big time

I use mascots all over my site. They host different sections here.

Bozilla the Clown makes a cameo here every once in a while and will host my 3D Theatre one of these days. The heavy metal goddess, Randi can be found in my newsletter section. And you see my main dude, CyberPal all over the site.
Continue reading “Stress-Man hits the big time”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Home Builder Scam forum tomorrow

New Yorkers and New Jersey folks who were screwed by predatory lending in the Poconos may want to get their butts back up here tomorrow.

Attorney General Mike Fisher announces a new lawsuit against yet another Pocono Builder yesterday.
Continue reading “Home Builder Scam forum tomorrow”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Fight the power!

C&Y critic Bayer takes his campaign to voters
(This post is also running at the American Family Rights Association forum)

Bruce Bayer, “A vocal critic of a county child protection agency, is mounting a write-in campaign for Monroe County commissioner. ”

Basically the readers digest version of the story was that Bayer thought C&Y (Pennsylvania’s CPS) would help, instead they took his stepsons away.

“We will be working now to tell other parents in Monroe County about Children and Youth and to warn them never to look to Children and Youth for help.”, says Mrs. Bayer.

While there was no abuse found, there was still a delay in returning the children. The outrage from the public, as the newspaper ran the stories on this case, helped speed up the process, forced several foster parents to return the kids back to the agency because “they couldn’t take the public outcry”, and the county commissioner (who is assigned to oversee C&Y) has offered no comment on the situation.

Now Mr. Bayer is after her job in the hopes to make a difference.

Related Links:

It’s days like these that I just love my job. :0)

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Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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A woman’s view of the Poconos

While waiting for my discharge papers, I couldn’t help but hear the story of a woman adjacent to me in the emergency room.

Severe headaches, halucinations… the cause? Her husband slamming her repeatedly in the head with the butt of his rifle. This happened on Sunday. She was there that night with the State Police for evidence, to be treated, and to issue an arrest warrant for the husband.

She came back yesterday. Whatever they gave her wasn’t strong enough. AND her husband is still on the loose. He seems to “get away” every time they decide to get off their asses to look for him.

Think the Poconos are bad on New Yorkers? Try being a woman.

They’re very slow to arrest an abusive husband… and yes, this is sadly a fact of life all over the country. When a husband seeks to kill someone they once loved, orders of protection are totally useless. That’s another sad fact in the United States.

But ladies… miss a child support payment in the Poconos, and they will throw the fucking books at you. It doesn’t matter. Monroe County Correctional Facility is filled to the brim with women who don’t pay child support… doesn’t matter how many kids are in that house as you’re hauled away.

One such case was a woman who had four children, two were with her, two were with him. He never gave her a dime of child support, she wanted very little to do with him.

But that’s irrelevant. He filed charges and she didn’t. She did three months.

Another amazing tale was Linda Fogle. Her husband, James Proctor… unemployed, in a trailer filled with garbage & cat shit, beat his 3-month old baby to death because she wouldn’t stop crying.

Well, a life sentence for Proctor wasn’t enough for the Monroe County legal system, was it? Why not go after the mother who worked two jobs to keep the family afloat?

“‘Linda was out busting her ass, and now this,’ said Donna Fogle, referring to the fact that her daughter worked while Proctor stayed in the trailer. ‘He trashed the place, not Linda,’ she said.”

Well goddamn it… Linda should have been the “happy homemaker”, as well as the breadwinner and bill payer. Proctor was the “man of the house”, he shouldn’t have to do sissy & menial stuff like clean & babysit his own kids. That was *HER* job too.

At least that’s what the judge thought.

“Glaring directly at Fogle, [President Judge] Vican asked rhetorically, ‘Why would you allow these children to live under such deplorable conditions ?’…”
“Calling Fogle ‘lazy, stupid and unconcerned’ for the welfare of her children, Vican told her, ‘You had no right to impose that (squalor) on your children.’..”

Actually, his exact words were “irresponsible bitch”, according to the reporter.
Continue reading “A woman’s view of the Poconos”

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Lawsuit Part 2

Ahhhh… I love the smell of Napalm in the morning….

Percudani, companies sue newspaper again

“STROUDSBURG – A new defamation suit against the Pocono Record and reporter Matt Birkbeck, focusing on the newspaper’s Web site, was filed this month by Gene P. Percudani and his companies, Raintree Homes and Chapel Creek Mortgage Banker, Inc.”

More specifically, he’s annoyed at my running the Pocono Record Special Report: A price TOO HIGH.

While the report focuses quite a bit on Raintree Homes (aka “Y-Rent“), it hardly (in my PERSONAL opinion) singles Raintree out as the “only” builder doing this. The website version is no different. I have to half wonder if he plans on going after WABC (N.Y.C.) and the New York Daily News too.

Bring it on, Percudani.

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Birkbeck wins for “A Price Too High”

Congratulations are in order to Matthew Birkbeck of the Pocono Record for winning the Investigative Reporters and Editors award for his investigative series:
A price too HIGH“… blowing the Home Builder/Inflated Appraisal scandal in the Poconos wide open.

It’s been long known as the Poconos’ “Dirty Little Secret”, where creative financing is used to lure New Yorkers to buy homes which end up worth a fraction of the cost by a real appraisal. The end result is you have a house you can’t afford, and no way to refinance for a better rate. (And you know how I was burnt!)

The news report focuses primarily on Raintree Homes (who sued the Pocono Record and lost…BIG TIME.), but I can assure you there are many more uscrupulous home builders just like them. New Yorkers really need to do their homework, before considering a move to the Poconos.
(Check out this spoof site of Raintree’s… it’s hilarious!)

Congratz, Matt!!!!

Other Great Links:

  • IRE Awards2001 Winners
  • N.Y. Daily News – Poconos a Ripoff Haven, Suit Alleges
  • WABC News – 7 On Your Side: A Home Buyer’s Nightmare
  • Eric Brooks

    Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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