Pet Peeve of the Year (for this week)

Recently seen on the web:

“I’ve moved to a new URL. Please email me and beg like a dog for the new address, and maybe, just MAYBE… I’ll give it to you.”

SoApBoX
Uhm, no. Ok?

I see a lot of these pages lately.
It’s just easier to take down their link, as they’re apparently hiding from someone.

You know… I understand the need for privacy, the occasional need to vent and let something out. We all do that sometimes. I understand password-protected entries, sites, or sections… perhaps you feel uncomfortable with a relative, employer, spouse, or a bloodthirsty stalker reading your innermost thoughts.

But when I see a message like the one above…
…perhaps publishing on the web isn’t for them, ya think?

Stupidity abounds on the web, especially in the blog world. People feel “freedom of speech” means you can say anything you want without repercussions, and blogs are treated like “private diaries”, you had the silly illusion you were anonymous until someone did a WHOIS lookup, blah, blah, blah.



As obnoxious as I seem on the web, I still adhere to the rule to never post, write, or leave on an answering machine something I wasn’t willing to say to a person’s face. Really. Ask Carole about any one of “Eric’s greatest hits” in real life with what I’ve said to people, especially her annoying friends.

Take it from someone who, this time last year, discovered every page of this site was printed and ready to be read to a judge in a court hearing.

I know whereof I speak.
A little self-censorship won’t kill you.
Trust me.

We make our mistakes, learn and move on. We don’t run, hoping who we are running from doesn’t find us again. I posted a link to a person’s “new” site once. They called me an idiot in my comments (“You idiot! How am I supposed to blog anonymously if you put a link to my page???”.)… you can bet I’ll never do that again.

People from my job read this site (including my boss. After all, he hosts the site), family reads it, my neighbors read it, and so do potential clients…

… which is what I understand the concept of the WORLD WIDE Web was all about. So I welcome it.

“The web is the last place in the world to attempt to hide anything. The code is against you. The browser is against you. The computer and its connection are against you. The structure and protocols used in the internet are against you.”
Alan Herrel – “Hiding Content

Go ahead… argue with me in my comments. Tell me I’m wrong. The floor’s open…

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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13 thoughts on “Pet Peeve of the Year (for this week)

  1. No doubt. I have my fair share of links to private blogs, and I do respect the decisions of folks to keep some things private, but some of these same folks give out the URL or password to so many people, it might as well be public, that’s what always gets to me. Then, if something is leaked to the rest of the world, they get upset. Folks never cease to amaze me.

  2. Having blogged “anonymously” in the past, I know from experience that there’s no such thing as being anonymous. At least, not for very long. Trying to hide *anything* on the internet is a lesson in futility. Someone’s going to find it and tell someone else, etc. If people want privacy, there’s always pen and paper…

    “Stupidity abounds on the web…”

    Can I get an amen?

  3. I don’t link to passworded blogs publicly for that reason. If the person has it passworded, it means they don’t want the entire world to read it.

    I can’t argue with you, e. I agree with everything you’ve said. I have to be careful of what I say on my blog because my husband reads it. I don’t know if my other relatives read it or not.

  4. Some of the best and worst things that have happened to me never made it to the website. There’s no reason for it. That’s what IM services and email are for. Of course, picking up the phone is even better. Getting out and talking to someone in person; genius.

  5. “Some of the best and worst things that have happened to me never made it to the website. ”

    Too true, my friend. And something I can definitely relate to.

  6. Yeah, that’s pretty simple…if you want something to be private, don’t put it on your blog…I mean, what’s the point of having a private blog if you’re going to tell people about it??

  7. My blog’s private but without hiding. A couple members of my family read it, but know not to go advertising the fact that it’s there to other family members. If my other half were to see it, and some of the things I’ve said about many topics, he’d probably leave me, but not having a wide social circle, a very demanding job which doesn’t let me off the PC for most of the day, I’m going to need to voice my [whatevers] and I need the feedback. If people like me, they can link, if not, they don’t. I am willing to accept the consequences of my blogging if specific people find out about it. It’s those people who believe that they SHOULDN’T HAVE TO that piss me off completely. The web is a communication tool, to use it as anything “private” is stupid.

  8. Yeah I can relate, I’ve talked so much shit about this dude I worked with (when I ran a site) that it made my life hell, he cried to the boss, the boss pleaded with me, and we know how that ended.

  9. hmm…I recently moved my blog because I decided it was easier for me if my family didn’t read what I had to say…it caused waaayyy too much drama.

    most of them aren’t internet savy, so I’m not all that worried about them finding me…but if they do, *shrug* oh well.

    I don’t think its a matter of saying things behind some one’s back vs to their face…for me, at least. and its not a matter of privacy, per sey. the problem I ran in to was my family and friends posting more detailed shit in my comments about what was going on in my life than I wanted on the http://www…you‘d think it SHOULD be the other way around…LOL

  10. It was me that called you an idiot; I remember that now with acute embarrassment. But, in my defence, it was because I was suffering a lot of flack from certain family members who were giving me stick about posting stuff that they “believed” I had written about them, even though I hadn’t. I upped blogs and changed names so that I could continue to blog “pseudo-anonymously” and then you put my real name linked to my new blog site.
    I probably was feeling particularly paranoid at the time. I still blog but keep it away from my family so that I have freedom to vent without them coming down on my anymore.
    I am sorry for the way I commented, e, I promise never to do it again, ok?

  11. I agree! Anyone who really wants to find these “private” blogs will find them anyway.

    I choose not to let people I can actually see and touch know about my blog, (they wouldn’t “get it” anyway) but I still don’t post anything so private or controversial that I need to filter who sees it.

    Seems to me the point of blogging is to let the world know what you think or what you are doing. Uncomfortable? Write a letter.

  12. Damn! I just now read this! Dude, I know exactly what you mean!!! I done this to a dude frm England who I met from the net. All my net pals was like “Look At His Pic First Before Meeting Him Cause You Never Know What May Happen!!!”…you would think I would listen? Hehehe…two weeks later the guy was calling me “Satan” for what I had to say about him via my online diary in which he had the link to prior to us meeting. I was always a concieted lil bitch and always going for a man’s look priority over his personality and sincerity…with this guy when I first met him…he treated me so good (online) that I was sure looks won’t effect my feelins for him in real life (online, I wz in luv with him…in real life was another story…). I was confident God was on my side this time and would hook me up with atleast an ALRIGHT lookin fella…turns out the dude was a Human Jabba The Hutt and he was cute and all that but damn…his ass wz so huge that it had stretch marks (fuck…the stretch marks HAD STRETCH MARKS!!!) and he had a body odor that was so bad…I swear to god it would kill the Devil and all his demonic sidekicks…and the entire human race!!! That is how bad it was. I got myself into a mess and as a result had to spend an entire week with his fat ass…and the worst part is…his family must of thought i was “THE ONE” cause his mom was all sweet to me treatin me as if I was bout to be her daughter in law and shit like that…I was like “Lord have mercy upon my soul…I am a heartless fiend with no feelings!!!!”. Luckily he let me use his pc cuz the amount of feelings and frustrations I had…I HAD TO BLOG in my online diary to get thru that week plus talk to my Welsh bestfriend and other friends from the UK…I begged everyone of them to let me come stay with them the remainder of the week cuz of the fact that I couldn’t stand another second with this fat fuck…they all had school and work and shit like that (unprepared for me)…which was totally understandable. So, my ass had to make the best of it…worst part is…I think he wanted to fuck me…can you imagine if that had happened? I wouldn’t be here now typin this…squash me to death underneath all that fat and the body odor alone would kill me (suffocation *LOL*). ANYWAYS!!!! Remember me saying good thing he let me use his pc (where I blogged and you know when you blog and ya pissed off like a motherfucker or something on your mind that you just gotta get off your chest…you do so in your bl og?), after I left his house and came back to USA like half a week later…no this was two weeks later…a close friend of mine (who was like a father to me) said it be best I make all those entries PRIVATE ENTRIES for he (the fat fuck) had the link to my journal and could read it. But seein as my ass was back home in USA, I was like “The fuck I care…am no where near his fat fuck ass and wzn’t really thinkin bout his feelings…nor was I necessarily caring at the moment…I wrote the most harshest things bout him in my diary…nough to break his lil ole heart. In truth he ain’t deserve that shit…but you know when you are upset and had to get your true feelins and thoughts out as soon as possible…you could careless bout what anyone thought or felt for it was your diary to say and do as you please right? Your own private lil world and you felt safe there…stupid ass me was so wrong. And I felt so badly after he read what I had to say and it was like a huge bitch smack in my face and to this day…I feel like shit and this was back in 2002. So, now my ass is extra careful when I blog bout someone else and think bout their feelings prior to saying anything in my blog. I really should of seen the signs of something being wrong prior to me going to England cause I remember I would make him cry ALOT!!! I mean I didn’t do it on purpose as am not some heartless bitch who is on the prowl to break a dudes heart and make him cry….but the fact that he was a big softie ass and a wooze ass turned me off and each time I try to drop his ass before things got serious…he start crying and than my ass would back down and blame PMS (big lie) or a bad day (nother big lie)…but my ass should of been tough and just end things right than and there before shit got serious (with feelins involve).

    So, yah! Although my story is completly different from the one you just told…I do know what it is like to have those you know and are close to read your private blog where you post your most intimate thoughts and feelings and than to have it reach to the point where you are viewed as someone cold hearted and evil…man…I so know what you mean there…to this day it still haunts me…*warm hugz* Am only sorry as innocent (innocent compared to me and the things I done in the same type of situation…you are innocent for you were only expressing your true thoughts and feelins in a place where you thought no one would find and expose you and your feelings) like you got caught in this horrible situation…no one should have to go thru this. A blog is a private journal where one writes bout their most intimate and private thoughts and feelins without the fear of others they know exposing them or reading such things…or if they do read them..have the repect to keep it to themselves and respect your privacy.

    Anyways, talk to you soon and take care.

    ~Pandora~

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