Stay Gone

A close friend thought of me with this song. I need to hear this song every once in a while in case I forget.

Ever have one of those people you love with all your heart, but it hurts being around them, and you can’t fix it? No matter how hard you both try? 🙁

Jimmy Wayne – Stay Gone
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Music video by Jimmy Wayne performing Stay Gone. (C) 2003 SKG Music Nashville LLC/Dreamworks Records Nashville

[Local News] Vengeful dad jailed 6-12 years in shooting

From LancasterOnline – NewsVengeful dad jailed 6-12 years in shooting:

“Any father would have done the same thing,” the prosecutor quoted Ricardo Rodriguez-Garlovo as writing to the Lancaster County judge.Upset that his wife and children had been robbed in their home while he was at work, Rodriguez-Garlovo admitted getting a gun in May 2007, driving to Church Street and…

The Broken Lion

Years of captivity tried to break the once-proud lion.
But when he closed his eyes at night, he entered a world of his own making.
He was no longer in his cage as he blissfully dreamt.
He was home once more, happily ruling his kingdom in the warm sun, or he imagined his escape.

One night, by chance, his cage was opened.
As he wandered out to breathe free air once more, he realized it was too late for him.
His home, his friends and all his loved ones were long gone.
The cold steely city around him wasn’t freedom… it was merely a larger cage.

And he never felt as alone as he did that moment.

He bowed his head in sadness and resignation,
And found his place back in his cage with regal dignity
As he closed his eyes for the final time, and drifted off into oblivion…
… he was finally free at last.

Each day is a curse.
Freedom is merely a state of mind.

No, I can’t imagine the pain

Almost three years ago, I took a stand against showing any photos of people jumping to their deaths FROM the World Trade Center.

Not out of weakness, or the inability to face life at its most gruesome… but out of consideration and sympathy. New York City is an hour away FROM here. I can’t think of anything crueler than watching someone you love face their final moments on this earth.

Over and over… and over.

I did the same today with the video of Nicholas Berg being beheaded.
His family lives here in Pennsylvania. An hour away or so in the other direction.

I don’t see politics here, I don’t see business. I certainly don’t see the “public’s right to know”.

I see a family in a great deal of pain right now, and a kind of torment I can’t possibly imagine.

My tears go out to Michael Berg and his family tonight. And my heart truly breaks for you.

God bless… :*(


There’s no such thing as “Father’s Day” here.

Not for me. Not on this site. Take a hike.

There are far more worthier people for you to send your well wishes and accolades on. They deserve it.

For Tom Butcher, the sperm donor responsible for the mess of a human being who writes the drivel on this site… I hope someone stumbles on this page in a google search, and lets you know someone out there thinks you’re a piece of shit on this lovely day.

I would like to think that somewhere deep inside my “father’s” black little heart that there might have been some shred of humanity in him. Maybe he thought of coming back to visit once or twice, but thought that maybe too much time has passed, it was too late, or he wanted to have this really good excuse that he’s come up with in a tomorrow that would never come.

My wife (who’s adopted) really pushed for me to try and track him down once we got the internet. I was able to communicate with people in his hometown in West Virginia. People were really responsive too.

It got really close until I told them who I was, and why I was looking for him.

Then these people stopped writing back.
So fuck them too.

I wrote “Dear Dad” on what would have been my mother’s 75th birthday. I decided this will be that one kick in the balls I’m sure my mother would have wanted to give him.

Because the day I wrote that… it officially became “too late”.
The window of understanding and forgiveness is closed forever.

I had one “happy” father’s day post here. In 2001, when the kids treated me out to a visit to stables, and I rode a horse for the first time. All the cute home-made gifts, waiting for me afterward… I felt like the luckiest guy on the planet.

It was just a few short weeks later that they were ripped out of my arms by the state police and two madwomen FROM Child Abductive Services with court orders, all for the crime of being down on our luck… and just because they can.

They’ve never gotten over it. They’re home, but they’ve never felt safe and secure since. I’ve never forgiven myself for allowing that to happen. And I can’t think of this day without remembering July 12th, 2001.

Don’t even think about contacting me today. Don’t want to be consoled, don’t want to hear about how I deserved it all for whatever I wrote about you or your friend in a post, and I sure as hell don’t want to hear about your “similar experiences”. Just back the fuck off today.

There’s no Father’s Day here.
Just broken hearts, an empty soul, and more rage and hatred than I know what to do with.

Unholy RAGE

Yes, Child Abductive Services are at it again.

How many more times are you going to have to see the same story, played over, and over, and over, and over… with different families in the starring role until you open your eyes and see this is VERY REAL and happening every day?
Continue reading “Unholy RAGE”


I am so sorry guys.

(Please respect their wishes and DON’T leave a comment on their site…)

It’s a time for them to grieve, be angry over something that will never have a sensible reason for happening, and have some time alone.

Believe me, I know. :0(
But at least I still know the feeling of parenthood… I can’t even begin to imagine their pain.

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