Resignations (part two)

State Representative Kelly Lewis has resigned on Monday.
This is bad news for my area… as he has been one of the best things that’s ever happened to the Poconos.

Actually, come to think of it… this totally SUCKS!
We’re all shocked and devastated.

Continue reading “Resignations (part two)”

Indecision ’04 – May the lesser evil win!

Erika: “Daddy said we’re only voting for people with a “K” in their names. ‘Kerry’, ‘Kelly’….”
Ashley: “What does the ‘W’ stand for, daddy.”
Me: “Uhhhh… ‘Walcer’, with a ‘C’… shut up!” 😉

Hooo-boy.
I was on line for a good 2 1/2 hours to vote.

I took my 11 year old, Erika in the booth with me. (Big Kelly Lewis fan, doncha know…).

You know what… I did my duty. I’m done.
I am so “Electioned out“, it ain’t funny.
Continue reading “Indecision ’04 – May the lesser evil win!”

Help Wanted: Posters on a message board

Can you guys do me a favor? (I’m spreading the word on this everywhere)

I just put the finishing touches on my job’s political/election model, and I got higher-ups watching me to see how well I do.

www.poconopolitics.com

It’s quite the programming masterpiece, if I do say so myself. Pure MySQL, database driven, has info on each of our voting districts, right up to Presidential candidate profiles.

Continue reading “Help Wanted: Posters on a message board”

What the hell was that???

I’ve been slaving away on a work related project (at home, as usual… I don’t think the kids would even know who I am, unless I showed them the back of my head.)

It’s for the election, so I needed to scour my sources for clip art like a flag, eagles & stuff.

Have you ever seen a bald eagle up close?
Oh. my. fucking. gawd. They’re all over the Poconos… and they’re HUGE!

It reminded me of a few weeks ago while heading in to Stroudsburg. I thought some kid was screwing with us with one of those big toy planes…

Hell no. It was an eagle with, I could swear, a six or seven foot wing span. And he was carrying his breakfast in his talons (I think it was a buffalo), and he’s swooping in to try and DROP it in front of our car as we’re on I-80.

I guess he wanted his food flattened or grilled or something.
Holy crap. Bad enough the deer are trying to kill us.

Home dentisty for the Manly Man

Yes. I’ve been a cranky S.O.B. for a few days now.
One thing I neglected to mention FROM the Beach Boys concert was how I pulled another cracked tooth out of my mouth and have been in mind-numbing agony since.

At the rate I’m going, the only way I’m going to enjoy a Wendy’s triple biggie sized combo is pureed and through a straw.
Continue reading “Home dentisty for the Manly Man”

B.B. King: The thrill ain’t gone!

Labor Day Festival

You didn’t go last night, did you?
Damn, you missed a SHOW and a half!
One more reason you all need to come up to the Poconos and visit me!

Me & Randi
We had a perfect spot on the lawn, where we laid out blankets and listened under the stars to some of the best Blues, Jazz & Rock & Roll artists on the planet.

(Sorry, I know I promised my tens of fans a team up of B.B., Lucille, me & Randi… but I am TROOLY not worthy to be on the same stage as that man. Maybe in, like, 150 years or so, ok? Besides I have “Mr. Mom” detail this week, as I am off on vacation, so Carole, Christina and Ashley can work the shows and hang with all the artists. So I have little ones.).
Continue reading “B.B. King: The thrill ain’t gone!”

Mountain Laurel Center for the Performing Arts is back, baybee!

State Rep. Kelly Lewis has done it again:
Lewis Announces Mountain Laurel Center Labor Day Concert Series“.

Of course I knew about it. It’s one of many surprises and changes we’ve got coming down the the pike for the ailing entertainment/tourist industry of the Poconos.

A lot of water and bad blood (and wasted money) has gone under the bridge since last year’s historic opening with Tom Ridge, and the disaster it slowly became.

It was run (to the ground) by morons.
Continue reading “Mountain Laurel Center for the Performing Arts is back, baybee!”

Mark Pazuhanich, Michael Jackson and a catholic priest walk INTO a bar…

Tickle Me SpazuhanichWe interrupt my summer-long vacation to bring you the following news:

Pazuhanich pleads no contest, resigns

Quote:
Former Monroe County Judge Mark Pazuhanich pleaded no contest Monday to charges that he fondled a young girl sitting next to him in the front row of a Hilary Duff concert in Wilkes-Barre. He was immediately sentenced to 10 years probation and will have to register as a sex offender under Megan’s Law.

HAHAHAHAHAH!!!!!!!
Yes, there is much partying and celebration in Anarchtica today.

I was asked months ago by my employers to be careful what I say on this matter. It was for my own protection, as his lawyers tried to sue once before for different clients. Sure, my employer’s legal team ate them up and spit them out… but I’m on my own when it comes to this site, and I can’t afford that kind of firepower.

And I do believe in the premise of “innocent until proven guilty”…

… even if it was witnessed by a concert goer, a security guard, and far-fetched conspiracy theories like the “police hypnotizing the victim” were flying all over the place.

However, when you admit you have a drinking problem, was convicted on four counts, and now has to be registered as a sex offender… I find it safe to assume that referring to him as “The Poconos’ drunken child molesting family court judge” now, I can’t be sued for libel. :0)
Continue reading “Mark Pazuhanich, Michael Jackson and a catholic priest walk INTO a bar…”

Jeff Gordon loses Pocono 500 (as usual)

My goodness…
How can I forget my traditional coverage of today’s NASCAR event?

  • It sucked
  • Traveling in the Poconos is damn near impossible on “race weekend”
  • Jeff Gordon is still a miserable, egotistical little prick
  • NASCAR fans scare the hell out of me. They’re like WWF fans loaded on Budweiser and Crack.
  • That is all….

    Happy Uno de Mayo!

    I am SEEEEEERIOUSLY backlogged with work and major life changes… but I thought I’d CHECK in with the three people still coming here. (Actually the Gay Marriage rant is getting quite lively, and the comments are still coming… wait until I unload the sequel!)

    I made this crazy lil' guy for a business called "La Tortilla Loca" a few years back
    All the resorts here in the Poconos are kicking off Cinco de Mayo celebrations this weekend… And, well, we need little or no reason to find an excuse to party and celebrate here…

    HAPPY UNO DE MAYO EVERYONE!!!!
    TORTILLAS, TACOS AND CORONA BEER FOR EVERYBODY!!!!

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