Relationship Tips on Twitter

Today on Twitter, the trending topic was RelationshipTip101. With such sage advice like “Nevah cheat on yo girl!” and “Never start one, it will only break ur heart 🙁“, I felt compelled to depart with some of my wisdom to help these young, misguided kids.

… and not because I am a shameless attention whore looking to get noticed on Twitter. Nope. Not ME!


  • When I borrow money, and giggle when you ask “when am I getting it back?”, it was probably just a tickle in my throat.

  • When I tell you I love you, and you hear a woman in the background. It’s prolly just the maid in this motel. Honest!

  • If a MAN ever hurts you or cheats on you, ask yourself “Did I burn the roast again? Did I say ‘no’ to sex recently?”

  • It is NEVER a good idea to invite your wife and your girlfriend to the same awards ceremony.

  • If your best friend is prone to violence, making moves on his mom is probably a very bad idea.

  • If you catch your man kissing another girl on the couch… Wait. What were you doing out of the kitchen, anyway?!?!!?

  • Your BF’s previous occupation was “Suicide Bomber”, and you are now realizing he has “Commitment Issues”… O RLY?

I hope this helped someone out there… 😀

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