Twitter Weekly Updates for 2011-06-19

Read more of my obnoxious statuses by following me on Twitter:

  • #whenihadaMyspace I used to laugh at the pathetic “people collectors” as if a zillion friends meant something (oh btw, follow me on Twitter) #
  • Man, I wanna get drunk tonite, but I hate the taste of alcohol. Everything in the cabinet smells like lighter fluid. #
  • So Obama Girl, @Amberettinger is now “Gadget Girl”? Good 2 know… i get tons of search engine hits from her. 😀 #
  • #smallbutpowerful – FINALLY! My dick is trending on Twitter. 😀 #
  • If I am a disappointment to someone, it’s clear that their standards just aren’t low enough to be around me. #
  • I am busy writing a book on how to write a book about writing. #
  • Friendly Reminder: The Log from Blammo! makes a great Father’s Day Gift… (hint! hint) #
  • Dear Today: You kicked my ass good. Congratz. I demand a rematch. Luv, -=e=- #
  • So guys actually make up these “heroic professions” to impress chicks on the internet? I just heard about this at today’s CIA debriefing. #
  • played a song Rolling In The Deep by ADELE on @myspace #
  • played a song Blow by Kesha on @myspace #
  • played a song Sure Thing by Miguel on @myspace #
  • Is it Friday and time to party yet? #
  • So a priest, rabbi and a horse walk into a bar… the bartender says ‘WHAT THE HELL? IS THIS SOME KIND OF A JOKE?’ #
  • Membership has its privileges. Long live the @StateofMANtana #
  • Membership has its privileges. Long live the Great @StateofMANtana #

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