Death Clock<\/a><\/strong>, I died back in the late 90’s). So, being bored out of my wits lately, the question is… “CAN I die?”<\/p>\nThere’s this one turn I take on the way home. It’s sharp around the mountain and I aim straight for it at 70 MPH (If a cop is reading this, that was a typo. I meant to type “25 MPH” like the sign posted says).<\/span> \ud83d\ude00<\/p>\nJust beyond the metal divider is this ravine… straight down.<\/p>\n
Each night I think to myself “This is it….”
\n… closer….
\n…… “Here we go”
\n…. *deep breath. Braces myself* ….<\/p>\n
Then, this reflex comes out of nowhere… my body jerks and I suddenly defy the laws of physics and make the turn.<\/p>\n
What.the.fuck?
\nSomeone (or something) wants me to live.
\nI’ve come to the conclusion that it’s something cruel and evil.<\/p>\n
I’ll try skydiving with my hands duct taped with boxing gloves on next. Let’s see what happens to me there. *neener*<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
I lived a pretty fun life. For all intents and purposes, it's over (Hell, according to the Death Clock, I died back in the late 90's). So…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":1,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[12,9],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1047","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-pure-unadulterated-stupidity","category-e-show"],"yoast_head":"\n
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