My Name is Eric, and I am a Problem Adult

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This time, around five years ago (June, 2005), I saw the Web Blogosphere dying a slow, painful death and realized Web 2.0 was all headed toward Social Networking, so I got together with a bunch of like-minded individuals to save our Web Presence and came up with a Community called…

Problem Adults

And it was a WONDERLAND! We had an arcade, we had goofy adventures in the message board, newsfeeds, promoting each other, Saturday Night Chats, an AI Bot that greeted newcomers (and we all flirted and tried to corrupt her), fake celebrity profiles… anything went as our imaginations ran wild.

We had… FUN!

MySpace? Well that was for kids. My children had accounts here for years and I felt I was stepping on their toes and didn’t want to invade their territory (in fact, my then-13 year old daughter showed me how to make myspace layouts). But I saw celebrities with websites like Tommy Lee, Dave Navarro, and Bobbi Billard making the jump here and using this as a promotional tool… bringing themselves to the masses, and I thought “What the hell”.

Problem Adults invade MySpace

Anyway… this isn’t even the point.

Look, I know I’m a prick, okay? I know I have a mean streak a mile wide, and I tend to get into mischief (did I mention I’m a PROBLEM ADULT?). I’ve been reviled on the web, I’ve had my share of fuck-ups that people never let me live down for YEARS, I’ve been shunned, and insulted, and blacklisted by the BEST… there’s also a WHOLE OTHER side of me that somehow leaks through in all I do. A good side, a kind and compassionate side. I am a nice buncha guys… but I try to keep much of “me” hidden from public view.

GangstaSo, I guess I have a thicker skin than most of the so-called “hardcore e-thugs” here that can’t seem to get past someone here not liking them or poking at them. Much of what I see around here from the “Drama Club” is a bunch of whiny insecure crybabies pretending to be badasses, and I am baffled at some of the things that freak people out/sets them off that they have to go to the lengths that they do to defend their cyber honor.

You need to comment under someone in every status and every every blog to let them know you don’t like them? REALLY?

You need to make everyone around you uncomfortable because they are a friend of someone you don’t get along with and you fear betrayal? SERIOUSLY????

… and my personal favorite… (and the actual point, I know, I know…)

You are up in arms because someone you thought was your friend had some negative observation about you????


Do you even REALIZE how weak and insecure you look to the rest of us???

OK, listen Chuckles… here is how the REAL WORLD works.

We all form opinions about EVERYONE here. You get to know people. You like them, even though some things about them can grate on your nerves sometimes. No one is perfect, and they have many sides to them. Even some of the most LOATHSOME people I have “met” online, I can find something good to say about them if I try hard enough. There’s none of this “unconditional love”/”Say nothing but good about me” crap. Anyone looking for that is bound to be disappointed very soon (and you know you can’t do it either… ya just never got caught yet.). I watch idiots vouch for and defend people they barely know around here all the time… and they look like they are merely lying and covering for them, or a bunch of sniveling sycophants.

Normal, well-adjusted people don’t just stop liking someone or stop being their friend because of someone’s say-so or some dumb scandal… unless they are as misanthropic and paranoid as the retard that brought the drama out into the public.

And the people that save their negativity for when they no longer like the person? Well anyone with a brain is watching them going “Gee, I wonder what they REALLY think of ME?”.

And the people that can beam over you one minute and then rag on you like you are the biggest piece of shit the next…? Oh hell no! Do you really want to be involved with someone THAT freakin’ unstable???

I will admit, that in many arguments online, I see a lot of truth in what’s being said about someone… regardless of how much I like/dislike the parties involved. That’s not an “act of betrayal”… it’s just being realistic. Learn from it, take what you can out of it… stop fucking whining and acting like your dead cat was dug up and molested. If there’s no truth to it, and it’s THAT absurd, laugh it off. Most of us know bullshit just being said to rile someone up when we see it. Who gives a rat’s ass what a bunch of strangers has to say and think?

It seems like “Genuine and Sincere” is a codeword for “Someone who blows sunshine up my ass and tells me I’m wonderful”. And “Keeps it Real” is the polar opposite, “Someone who hates everyone with pure bile and negativity”.

Who the fuck wants to get close to people like that??? (Besides a Therapist?)

Guerrillero put it best the other night when he said “I like a whole bunch of you, but I wouldn’t invite you to my home“. That’s kind of how I feel about everyone too. I’m not looking to forge solid lifelong friendships on MySpace to fill some pathetic void in my real life… I’m here to be entertained and have some light hearted fun.

There is way more to all of us than meets the eye.

Let’s just keep it at a respectful distance and emotionally detached from now on, ok?

And if you have an issue or two with some of my behavior, well… I’m ok with that… and vice versa.

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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Disclaimer: The views expressed herein are solely those of Eric Brooks. They do not necessarily reflect those of his employers, friends, contacts, family, or even his pets (though my cat, Puddy, seems to agree with me on many key issues.). In accordance to my terms of use, you hereby acknowledge my right to psychoanalyze you, practice accupuncture, and mock you incessantly with every visit. As the user, you also acknowledge that the author has been legally declared a "Problem Adult" by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, and is therefore not responsible for any of his actions. ALSO, the political views and products advertised on this site may/may not reflect the views of Puddy or myself, so please don't take them as an endorsement. We just need to eat.