Night of the Idiot

“OMG!!! She was so ugly, she looked like she was just hit with a hot bag of ‘ What the Fuck ‘…!!!!!!”

– Overheard yesteday from a 16 year old with a mohawk. –

Well, my first day as a Mutated Self-Aware Computer Virus didn’t go as well as I had hoped. The first thing I learned is that you can’t expect to wipe out 120,000 hard drives when you pass yourself along in an email with the subject: “I’M A VIRUS!!!! CLICK ME, YOU ASSHOLE!!!”.

Ok. Three people on AOL fell for it.

The Next trip was trying to cheer up poor, sickly, KittyBat, who had her first BatChat last night. The instructions were really hard for moronspeople to follow, so I made a loverly graphic, with even more specific instructions. (LinkMeister did the same on the Z-List Blog)

Problem is it took me so damn long, that by the time I was done posting it, everyone went home.
But it was a pretty nice turn out. Even if they were all nervous because, well, a virus was in the chat room flirting with them.

Then next stop was The SickSider’s new home…

I didn’t mean to do it…
Everyone was having fun with the Microsoft-proprietary “Marquee” tag. So I did it. ‘cept I forgot to close my tag, and poor Kimberly’s entire page was whizzing all over the place and no one else could comment!

I wasn’t even worth a writeup on SARC.

All the other trojans & worms were teasing me and calling me a “hoax”…. :0(

It was more like “Night of the Idiot”.
Gonna be a better virus tonight. Watch.

Eric Brooks

Musician, Programmer, Graphic Designer, Evil Clown - A thorn in the Internet's side since 1997 with no intention of stopping any time soon.

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9 thoughts on “Night of the Idiot

  1. Argh! Help!! Now you´re a virus? You´re really a victim of your multiple personalities uh? Eric, Dr. LoKi, the enemy of the state, a virus….

  2. Pay no attention to Mr. Mitty – Eric is an Adorable Pig.
    And BatChat is up again next Thurs so you can graphic me up then, hon.

  3. And as always I note that you can call Eric any kind of noun – just stick Adorable on there and he’s pleased. Isn’t he a cute lil echidna?

  4. you are welcome to come and fuck up my page anytime….
    (only if I can fix it tho…)

  5. Thanks Kimberly… again, sorry ’bout that.
    Hey did you see, Batgrl called me "cute" in the previous comment… *GLEE*

  6. Short–beaked Echidna: "The insects stick to the Echidna’s sticky tongue and are drawn into its mouth where they are chewed up between a horny pad at the back of the tongue and a similar structure on its palate."

    THAT’S ME!!! THAT’S ME!!!!!
    (Man, they got some weird–ass animals in Australia… aint you guys ever heard of EVOLUTION???!!??)

  7. Aaaahhh, but it gets worse, my sweet little fraulein… on another site, I’m "The CyberPal", "Rockstar", and "The Elitist WebGod Bastard"…

    Psycho with MPD, worthless slug incapable of loving or being loved, or just some fun–loving guy on the internet who likes to be different people when he feels like it…? Who can say for sure?

    But I can hear your heart racing right now & smell the fear of everyone….

    Or is that liver on the frying pan I smell, with Fava beans & a nice Chianti? FFT–FFT–FT–FT–FT–FT… :0)

  8. She called me ADORRRRRABLLLE!!!!

    Jeez, I was wondering how far I’d have to go to get called that again… :0)

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