Fed up with “professional politicians”, their empty promises and their failed policies?
So am I.
Watch this space as I make my pitch to become the next President of the United States.
(I mean I can’t make things worse, right?)
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The way politics SHOULD be played. Not that anyone will listen.
Fed up with “professional politicians”, their empty promises and their failed policies?
So am I.
Watch this space as I make my pitch to become the next President of the United States.
(I mean I can’t make things worse, right?)
Nah. Not really.
It just proves Kerry still sucks at cracking jokes.
Well, Kerry just plain sucks if you want me to be more specific.
What was supposed to be a crack at the “Commander-in-Chimp” (who has an entire WEBSITE dedicated to his verbal misfirings)… well FrankenKerry fucked the whole delivery of the joke up. What do you expect from a guy who blew 2004? Move on Democrats.
Jon Stewart is relieved to know his job is still safe. ๐

Continue reading “John Kerry blows it (again) Republicans WIN!”
Beyond Belief! – Religious Ramblings
One of the best essays I have ever read. A Pagan named Father Crow breaks down religious belief and human nature. It boils down to Aristotle and his theory of dualism… either something is, or it isn’t.
Continue reading “Disinformation :: Beyond Belief! – Religious Ramblings”
I picked up a book that caught my eye on the way to my “Home away from home”. Blink : The Power of Thinking Without Thinking.
Continue reading “Book of the day- Blink : The Power of Thinking Without Thinking”
In the world of web design and advertising, there is the rule of “KISS” (“Keep It Simple, Stupid!”).
This basically means that your HTML masterpiece isn’t worth a crap if your readers don’t bother to wait for it to load, or your magazine spread loses its message when you clutter it to show off your Photoshop and Quark prowess.
I got the following comment from a Comment Spammer, which I found invaluable.
“When you wish to instruct, be brief; that men?s minds take in quickly what you say, learn its lesson, and retain it faithfully. Every word that is unnecessary only pours over the side of a brimming mind. “
It’s so true.
Why do you think the simplicity of the Bush campaign beat out the long-winded Kerry?
Why does Instapundit is so popular over so many other blogs?
Why do major companies pay a fortune for a 30-second commercial when they can make a half hour infomercial on late night tv?
Not every one is an intellectual with a long attention span. In fact I’d say very few are.
If you want to reach out to the masses…. Keep It Brief, Stupid!
Dear Democratic Party:
OMG, you friggin’ people suck.
I came across this revelation as I walked Stroudsburg on my lunch hour, and I tripped over a wino.
You know what? I was convinced even HE could have beaten Bush in this election.
Americans all agree that Dubya is the kind of guy you’d want to have a beer with.
Well, guess what? My wino friend is already there, man!
Come up with all the conspiracy theories you want (Jewish touch screen voting machines by gay Halliburton martians, whatever…) Look, Bush won the election. He was winning Ohio when I went to bed at 3AM.
Now you are going to rack your brains out for the next four years going “where did we go wrong?”
Fact is, you fucking people don’t listen. You make the same mistakes over and over. You did it in 2000, you did it in 1988… you’re gonna do it again in 2008.
Erika: “Daddy said we’re only voting for people with a “K” in their names. ‘Kerry’, ‘Kelly’….”
Ashley: “What does the ‘W’ stand for, daddy.”
Me: “Uhhhh… ‘Walcer’, with a ‘C’… shut up!” ๐
Hooo-boy.
I was on line for a good 2 1/2 hours to vote.
I took my 11 year old, Erika in the booth with me. (Big Kelly Lewis fan, doncha know…).
You know what… I did my duty. I’m done.
I am so “Electioned out“, it ain’t funny.
Continue reading “Indecision ’04 – May the lesser evil win!”
There’s a lot going on in my professional life right now. This is evidenced in my lack of activity here and on my friend’s sites. Politics is fun and all, but I’m only interested in it with the aspect of ridiculing it. My mind is made up, your mind is made up… and the only purpose we’re serving right now is to drive anyone FROM our sites in the years to come by trying to play “online pundit”. I am looking beyond November 2nd at this point… and hope many of you will be sticking around.
I have an art director’s position waiting for me in the near future. I just gotta hang in there, and continue being the “nobody” I am now. I have the blessings of my family to resign any time I’d like, but there are some exciting things going on, whether my contributions are recognized or not:
In the present I have the opportunity to work with top notch professionals that gave ABC News its presence on the web. The time for newspapers to acknowledge reality and embrace the future has come, and I want to be a part of that transition team. I also have the frustration of people with a small-town/RIAA-like mentality to struggle with on a daily basis. It’s taking a lot of my time… I have data, surveys and reports eating my brain.
Fortunately I am POWERED by negativity.
Enough about me… here’s what’s going on with my friends on the web:
Radicals are in every movement. And they destroy that movement faster than the people you’re advocating against. They also kill the credibility of your cause. (See PETA and Greenpeace for a few examples. While there are some decent and relatively sane people involved, their reputations have all been tarnished and overshadowed by the actions of their extremist element.)
More as I think of them…
This one was less “massacre-like” in my opinion. Very informative, and I think, if anything Bush and Kerry definitely succeeded in defining the differences between what they have to offer.
HOWEVER… I could well imagine if you’re a fan of Bush or Kerry, this wasn’t going to change your mind and make the switch. I have written the following seven questions that, if answered correctly, would have changed my vote:
President Bush: “In 1912, the captain of the Titanic decided to ‘stay the course’ despite the warnings of icebergs. Where did they bury the survivors?”
Senator Kerry: “Do I look fat in these jeans?”
President Bush: “Mr. President, can you look the camera straight in the eye, and (just once) pronounce the word ‘NU-CLE-AR’ correctly?”
Senator Kerry: “Senator Kerry, level with the American people… how much botox was injected INTO your chin by mistake?”
President Bush: “Mr. President, Saddam Hussein was a very very very bad man. My question is… Quick! What’s the capitol of North Dakota?”
Senator Kerry: “Senator Kerry. The Bush campaign has labeled you a “flip-flopper”. In your 20 years in the Senate, how many times have you tied up traffic at a Wendy’s drive thru?”
Both Candidates “Barbara, Jenna or Alexandra. Who do you think the average American male voter should be masturbating over the most right now and why?”
See also: Misty has some suggestions to make the debates more fun!
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Aw yeah, baby. Can you just SMELL the testosterone in the air?
Time for us all to put on our Sunday best (or Ted Nugent t-shirts) and rush to K-Mart and buy us some TEC-9’s.
You know, maybe I had President Bush all wrong. In a day and age where Americans are scared shitless to fly planes, the government wants to know how much you have in the bank, what library books you’re taking out, and parents wake up screaming FROM nightmares that their kids may be slaughtered in school by nutcases…
HEY!!! MAYBE HAVING ASSAULT WEAPONS HIT THE STREETS IS THE WAY TO GO…YEEEEEE HAW!!!!
(Scene in school lunchroom)
Billy: “Hey Tommy, what’s in your lunchbox?”
Tommy: “Well let’s see… PB&J, a drinkbox… AND A 9mm MOTHAFUKKIN UZI, FAGGOT!!! WANT SOME? WANT SOME??? BRING IT MOTHAFUKKA!!!”
Ah ha ha… you can bet little Tommy won’t be HAVING trouble with the school bully in the playground THIS semester. (Provided Butch isn’t packing his MAC-11 too!)
Continue reading “Assault Weapons for everyone…YEE HAW!”
Disclaimer: The views expressed herein are solely those of Eric Brooks. They do not necessarily reflect those of his employers, friends, contacts, family, or even his pets (though my cat, Puddy, seems to agree with me on many key issues.). In accordance to my terms of use, you hereby acknowledge my right to psychoanalyze you, practice accupuncture, and mock you incessantly with every visit. As the user, you also acknowledge that the author has been legally declared a "Problem Adult" by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, and is therefore not responsible for any of his actions. ALSO, the political views and products advertised on this site may/may not reflect the views of Puddy or myself, so please don't take them as an endorsement. We just need to eat.