Category: Sex and the Workplace

Could be about sex, could be about work, could be about both… who knows until you read it?

Your Easter Egg, or your life!

Posted on by Eric Brooks

Sorry dudes. Fell asleep the minute I got home, and never finished the Super Dudes. Had an Easter Egg Hunt at work today (no, really.) Found a couple of eggs with tootsie rolls, destroyed the newsroom, and even found an egg with a raffle ticket where I won $1. (Cash is ALWAYS an acceptable gift.)

This of course wiped me out. It takes a lot of energy to ransack your boss’ office. Goofing off in his IM, talking to his contacts, pretending to be him… all in the name of finding that one Easter Egg where you get the day off with pay.

Somebody else got it.
Bastard.
BLOW ME!
I’m flooded with memories of 1981 where we were caught in a riot in Central Park in NYC (anyone remember that?) We’re there on the Great Lawn for the Easter egg hunt. The imbeciles in charge were running late, so they decided (in their infinite wisdom) to start tossing Easter eggs out INTO the crowd, right off the truck.

Of COURSE we’re gonna beat the piss out of the smaller and weaker for their Easter Eggs! We’re New Yorkers, what do you expect?

My cousins and I are pounding on smaller kids, while getting punched in the face by their parents. I had to literally pull my mom, by her feet, out of a 30-person pileup…

Only to get home, and watch Channel 11 news portray us as a pack of animals in their footage! The nerve!!!! It was survival of the fittest that day.

EricBrooks.Com – Where we’ll kill you for your Easter Eggs!
Send someone a FREE Passover/Easter E-Card, and spread the news…

“T” as in “Pterodactyl”

Posted on by Eric Brooks

It’s Saturday… I’m bored out of my skull here at work.
I just had another one of my “Walter Mitty” moments….

I’m listening to the police scanner in the background of the empty newsroom as an officer is requesting information on someone named “Palmer”.

The trooper spells out the name: “Peter”, “Alpha”, “Lima” (as in Peru, not the bean. This is important later), “Mary”, “Echo”, “Run”….

I’m thinking back at my days in Travers Tool Company, in College Point, Queens. This one guy always got a kick out of me on the phone fucking with the purchase orders I was checking up on.

“B” as in “Bavid”
“D” as in “Doy”
“T” as in “Pterodactyl”… stuff like that.

Anyway… back to the Police scanner.
After hearing “Lima”, I can just imagine me interrupting the officer on the radio for clarification:

“Did you mean ‘Lima’ or ‘Lemur’…?”

It is moments like these that you need to get down on your knees and thank some Deity somewhere that I’m not on the police force…

 

UP NEXT
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This month’s EVENT OF THE CENTURY… 

A new mogul in Anarchtica?

Posted on by Eric Brooks

Oh gee… isn’t *THAT* special…
How sweet it is for Carol Brooks

Oooooo laaaa-dee-da
Even references to the Adorable-you-know-who’s in it.

Yeah, well..maybe I’m a little proud. :0)

Oh, scream nepotism all you want, you heartless jackals… I actually had nothing to do with this one.

Ms. Scarponi heard about all the chocolate houses & pops flying off the shelves of stores and restaurants all over the area, and contacted her early in the week about her column. (In fact, tonight was the first time I actually *met* Lisa.)

Okay… well, I put up the EPCN site a day early, ‘cuz I wont be at work tomorrow, and I wanted to make sure it was done right.

I’m proud of you honey… congratulations!

When worlds collide…

Posted on by Eric Brooks

Jeesus!!!??!!??

When the heck does a cyberworld, work, and personal life hit all in one spot to anyone else?

From Today’s Pocono Record:
Jeff Huffert of CB Gifts was up almost all night making fresh treats for the sale. His booth featured hand-made colored white chocolate pops, boxed sets and centerpieces shaped as Santa’s sled, all edible.

JEEEZ!
As you know, Jeff was here for thankgiving. Also crashed here this weekend. I feel sorry for the poor bloke…

He’s currently employed by a SLAVE DRIVER who made him work all friday night to make chocolate pops and chocolate Christmas houses.

I know his boss all too well. Rumor has it that she’s paying her graphic designer with sexual favors to build her a website… not that there’s anything wrong with that. ;0)

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