Name the newsletter title contest…

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I’ll probably be sending out another WHUZZUPDATE! Newsletter out on Monday. I had some issues with the mailer back in May, which resulted in a lot of undeliverable mail to

  • AOL addresses
  • POP3 emails
  • ISPs with very strict spam filters
  • … and well, dead emails as my mailing list was pulled off my Yahoo Club circa 2000.

  • Thanks to Solonor, Maria, and my in-laws being test subjects, I resolved (most of) the issues. And I have a ton of new announcements about freebies and changes to the site.

    HERE’S THE CONTEST:

  • Give me a nifty title – Something that separates this junk mail FROM the penis enlargers, and generic viagra ads.Past titles included:
    “I got my @$$ kicked by a Teletubby”
    “The groundhog predicts nuclear holocaust”
    “Sorry I made you an alcoholic, ma!”
  • Unsubscribe info – Something reeeeeally unpleasant. The point is, I don’t want anyone unsubscribing, unless they hate it so much they’re willing to chew their own leg off to get out of it.Example:
    “Show up in the rowdiest biker bar in town, and stand next to to some guy named ‘Snake’ while you’re wearing an ‘I’m with Stupid‘ t-shirt.”

    “Attend a PETA rally, and pull out a meatball sub (with a tail) for lunch.”

  • I’ll probably use runner-ups in future editions. And yeah there’s prizes involved.

      I need…. 

    • Title:
    • To Unsubscribe:
    • Leave them in the comments.

    Got it? GO!
    (Well, you have all weekend… no rush)


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    18 thoughts on “Name the newsletter title contest…

    1. Title: New Issue Of “Interspecies Romance” features Eric and human female – his wife!

      To Unsubscribe: Tug on superman’s cape, spit INTO the wind, pull the mask off the ol’ Lone Ranger, and mess around with Jim. In that order.

    2. Title: Bush declares war on Staten Island

      To Unsubscribe: You must accept your fate of living on and island with an unlimited supply of cigarettes… and no matches.

    3. I think for an unsubscribe a good one would be “Anal warts removed with the email!”

      And non spam header would be Kitten bbq is miracle drug! or maybe reverse them…r

    4. Title? We don’t need no stinking title!

      you can’t unsubscribe, you’re in this for life, and don’t think about trying to change your email address or anything cause we WILL track you down…deal with it!

    5. Title: “It’s like ‘Faces of Death’…for pervs!” (that’s a “Hubby-ism” regarding a video we see advertised on TV in case you were wondering).

      Unsubscribe: “Open the pod bay doors, HAL”.
      “I’m afraid I can’t do that.”

    6. I have a great title!!

      “The Preacher touched me in my special place!”

      //** Yes this was funny as hell, but the rest was edited. Please start playing nice here, Gordon, or we’ll have to move you to the kiddie table. thanks. :0) **//
      – The Management who believes the Constitution is Un-Constitutional –

    7. Generally, this is an “anything goes” place… especially if it’s funny.

      It’s just the second half was in bad taste, and it’s a little too complicated to explain. I actually had email requests to DELETE the entire comment, which I didn’t want to do.

      Otherwise, I’m about as politically correct as your typical Jerry Springer show. :0)

    8. I have now seen it all…
      politically correct as your typical Jerry Springer show.
      thats it!!
      describes you perfectly -e-, not to mention would make a great title…LOL

    9. Yep. The Jerry Springer one works for me.

      But then again, so does:
      “Dwarf Tossing INTO the 23rd Century”.

      Or:

      “It’s life Jim, but not as we know it, not as we know it, not as we know it.”

      And:

      “It’s worse than that, he’s DEAD, Jim!”

      (Yes, I’ve been listening to Star Trekkin’.)

      Unsubscribe: First admit to yourself that this was a major case of coyote ugly, then chew your arm off. Or you can simply reply to XXX. It’s the same thing really.

    10. okay me and my legs are pissed ~ YET AGAIN, I received NO “newsletter” GRRRR ~ and if it is a virus one wants *very very wicked smile* I have a copy of one saved for those SELECT few I choose to destroy completely ~ now back to the newsletter ~e~, I’m hurt, I’m crushed, I’m PISSED!!! WHERE IS MY COPY? LOL

    11. Hey!!! I like Gordon, watch what you say about him, pal!!!!

      Actually, if you haven’t noticed, I do a lot of posts without comments. Sometimes you just want to ramble, you know?

      Believe me, sites and discussions are degrading to shit all over (and this is long before all the recent events.) It seemed like a good policy when .:Chapel Perilous:. started enforcing one.

    12. Well, Legs… I haven’t sent the newsletter out yet. I could be wrong, but that may be one of the reasons you were left out. :0)

    13. Title:And these are the tales of the enema..

      To Unsubscribe:Please place all the inner and outer species to your right.Thank you.

    14. Pingback: The (mis)Adventures of Spreegirl

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