New categories… less filling, tastes CONFUSING

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**// Coming here FROM DayPOP? The Golden Finger Awards are HERE //**

gfingr1.gifI’ve decided that a third post is in order…
To stick this in the Round II post will be very confusing.

This will be Round 2
I also added a few new categories w/ descriptions. At this rate I may never have to come up with a clever post again, and leave you all to do the linky lovin’ *for* me…


IS THIS POST ABOUT ME?
Why, yes. Yes it is! You are the stars, the moon, and the sun, baby! Tim Berners-Lee created the web JUST for you, and Evan came up with the schematics for Blogger with YOU in mind! Contrary to what Robyn’s highly-paid minions and lackeys would have you believe… YOU, sir, are TROOLY The Princess of the Blogiverseโ„ข. Aaaand if the shoe fits… hey, throw the damn thing out and start a flame war, fer chrissakes. What good is HAVING only ONE shoe that fits anyway?

  • My CD’s are more important than the HolocaustJessica of Peace Dividend
    (Awarded by Melly)
  • Most direct method of viewer weeding that I’ve ever seen.Angel of KissMyFish.Net
    (Awarded by John)
  • Snarkiest BloggerJohn of Linkworthy
    (Awarded by Faith)
  • Queen of the UniverseFaith of ctrl-alt-ego
    (Awarded by Maria)

OVERALL SEXINESS

  • Best Ass – Angel of Kiss My Fish.Net
    (Awarded by Solonor)
  • Best AssSolonor of Solonor’s Ink Well
    (Awarded by Angel)

**// Wait… can we DO that??? *SHRUG* //**

  • Geekiest online relationship (of course with her lil’ code monkey) – GeekGrrl
    (Awarded by Jewdez)
  • Excellent use of sexy colors – Faith of ctrl-alt-ego
    (Awarded by Nico)
  • Best Streaking During a Golden Finger Acceptance Speech – Jewdez
    (Awarded by Kathy K.)

BOO. FUCKING. HOO.
AWWWWWW!!!!!! Lookit -e-, HAVING a pity party at his own awards show! Nobody’s nominating him for jack shit. Let’s toss a few his way to shut him the fuck up before he starts whining again.

  • Most Shameless (and successful) Trackback-Whoring on the Net
    (Awarded by Pete)
  • Best satire of the ?Bloggies?
    (Awarded by Les)
  • Most excessive use of Vaseline Intensive Care
    (Awarded by Nico and Jewdez)
  • Most Likely to Get Hickies in Linky Love?
    (Awarded by Batgrl)
  • Blogger who took the longest to get his site NS compliant.
    (Awarded by Faith)

TALENT??? YOU NEED TALENT IN THIS BIZ?
Some bloggers tend to go against the grain and actually *DO* something that interests someone other than themselves. No. Really. It happens sometimes.

  • Fastest clicking of a link in someone else’s commentsSolonor of Solonor’s Ink Well
    (Awarded by Angel)
  • Best blog named Joe by a guy named Scott
  • Scott, of JoePixel
    (Awarded by Faith)

  • “Classiest Blogger” in the “I can actually WRITE category”Dawn of Blatherings
    (Awarded by Maria)
  • Classiest use of Retro (Kitsch?) styling in a weblog Faith of Undisturbed
    (Awarded by Angel)
  • Excellent use of the hopeless color combination of pink and redMin Jung Kim of Brain Dump
    (Awarded by Nico)
  • Best blog using home brewed blogging softwareSue Bailey of SueBailey.Net
    (Awarded by Dan)
  • Best collage graphicsBatgrl of Have a Cuppa
    (Awarded by Faith)

HOLLYWOOD LOOKALIKES/ACTALIKES

  • Best use of Buffett lyrics in a blogBran of .em
    (Awarded by Dan)
  • Best Link That Made Us All Cringe: The Cheeky Girls SongMike of akacooties
    (Awarded by Kathy K.)

CODING AND DEVELOPMENT

  • Most blog design changes in a year/month/week/day/hourBran of .em
    (Awarded by Dan)

LIFETIME ACHIEVEMENT

  • Blogging longer than God – Mark of furtive explorations
    (Awarded by Rha)
  • Blogger With The Largest Smilie CollectionGina of Recycled Thoughts
    (Awarded by Maria)

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36 thoughts on “New categories… less filling, tastes CONFUSING

  1. Wait – you’re not supposed to give yourself an award if you’re already the benevolent dictator, er, host of the show and the judges…

    Oh wait, what am I saying, this is Eric – how bout another award for Most Likely to Get Hickies in Linky Love? No, I don’t know what that means either, just that it sounds Eric-esque.

  2. Hee hee!!! Love it…
    Well, Batty a whole room full of witnesses saw me trying not to accept an award from Pete last night… but well, how much worse can it get here?

    Hmmm… no one’s picked on MizDos, up there…. any suggestions?

    “Knows Professor Snape’s lines better than Alan Rickman?”

    I’m tapped here… come on you clever litle comedy trolls… don’t let me down here! LET’S PICK ON BRAN!!!

  3. Can we do one for best Blogger who cheated on her husband all over the internet and then blamed him for the divorce? Um….

    That’s not what I was supposed to say. I was supposed to be nominating Batty for best collage graphics and Eric for blogger who toook the longest to get his site NS compliant. Or perhaps Mr. John Linkworthy as Snarkiest Blogger.

    Yes, that’s what I was supposed to be saying.

  4. Hmm… Bran… “Most blog design changes in a year/month/week/day/hour”? She’s a sweep in that category!

    …or how about, “Best use of Buffett lyrics in a blog”?

  5. OOH! I like that Dan…

    I don’t know what’s up with those two Nico, all day yesterday with Lambchop, today it’s Angel… Solonor is like some “digital gigolo” or something. :0)

  6. I just KNEW this whole thing was about ME!! I knew it all along! So glad you made that announcement!! ;o)

    Faith, LMAO!!!! You are too good girl!! You need to get the Queen of the Universe Award!!! :o)

  7. Hmmmm… Maria and Faith know something I don’t…
    Something ain’t right here.

    I am so gonna lose my tiara as a gossip whore.
    I’ll tickle it out of Maria later. ;0)

    I am ready to put the wraps on this… I’m being hit by Daypop like a mutherfucker today, and now simulcasting these results in two entries. (mouse hand getting tired)

  8. most excessive use of Vaseline Intensive Care? I would have said “Improper Use”…

    Reminds me of yet another silly story: Bunch of friends were down at Mardis Gras. They came back to the room to find our friend Larry with the phone in one hand, a bottle of the hotel hand lotion open on the nightstand, and something else in the other hand. Needless to say, it was too good a story not to tell. Larry’s birthday rolled around 3 months later, on which he was presented with at least 50 bottles of lotion – all nicely wrapped of course.

    You do know what you’re getting as a birthday present now, don’t you? ๐Ÿ˜‰

  9. most excessive use of Vaseline Intensive Care? I would have said “Improper Use”…
    No. I’d say they got it right the first time. :0)

    Vaseline intensive care is hand lotion for dry skin… so yes, I was using it properly too. You’ll be happy to know I gave the old bottle of oil of olay to my roommate and bought a new one.

    Yes boys, and girls… for those who don’t read Nico’s blog… THIS IS THE MOTHER OF ALL T-M-I STORIES!!!

    You’ve been warned. I’m not responsible for any ensuing nightmares or loss of appetite thereof. :0)
    I’d write more, but my vision fails every now & then. ;0)

  10. I am very much pleased to have been named Queen of the Universe. For my first official act, I shall name Nico my official maseusse.

  11. [dear -e-, i just sent you an email but i realized that it’ll prolly sift to the bottom of your outlook box bc the date/time on my puter is all hosed and outlook will chuck it by date, right? so look for a mail dated April 1999. please read it forthwith. you are a pomegranite. which is a good thing.]

  12. WOW!!! I love pomegranites!!!
    Reply is on it’s way…
    (MizDos on my site… and the place is such a mess!!! EEP!)
    ….-
    COMMENT:
    You guys are a hoot! ๐Ÿ™‚

    Thanks for the award, Eric and Maria.

    I just have one question … that “Blogging longer than God” award … I didn’t know God had a blog. Do you have the URL? I’d really like to read that one! =:-O

  13. At the risk of being beaten with a big orange stick, I’m going to have to disagree with Faith’s nomination of Batty… I went to her site and didn’t see ANY collage graphics… I’m in collage, and I know a collage graphic when I see one. Hrmph.

    While I’m risking being beaten with a big orange stick, I might as well go here too: I hereby nominate Faith for: The most cuddliest and sweet blogger in the whole dern blogiverse! *snicker*

    …and I’ll work on find some REAL collage graphics. ๐Ÿ˜‰

  14. I wonder if Dan knows he won for “Most twisted use of Green Lantern in a webcam”, in the middle of this train wreck… all I want to do, just once, is to be “first post” on Red Cricket. Is that REALLY too much to ask for?

    I didn’t know God had a blog.
    According to God’s OTHER son, the Almighty wouldn’t be caught dead with a blog….

  15. or those who don’t read Nico’s blog…
    Who the hell is that? Please identify yourselves ;o)

    For my first official act, I shall name Nico my official maseusse.
    A very good choice. Now let us ask -e- for some Oil of Olay ;o)

    Solonor is like some “digital gigolo” or something. :0)
    I see. Well, I’m not jealous. I will anyway have my hands full of Faith and no time for digital whoring ;o)

  16. Oh Nico – I could SOOOO get in trouble there! You left a chasm a mile wide!! Oh it’s so tempting…. But Faith will torture me endlessly, so I’m going to crawl back under the boardwalk and keep my mouth shut….

  17. Torture or not, you can’t start hinting about things that I might find very interesting and then act like a coward and run for cover! Now I’m not (unfortunately) familiar with her methods, but I can imagine that it’s the kind of nice, mild torture some of us would pay to get.

  18. Watch out lampchop!! Faith IS Queen of the Universe you know!! Don’t go there!! ;o)

    ~Waiting patiently to be tickled….. *big smile*~

    Dawn, God’s blog is password only. We’re not allowed to give out the password, or we have to go to hell. Do not pass Go, do NOT collect $200.00…..

    Gina, You da girl!!! When I need a smilie fix, I just head over to the smilie capital of the world!! ;o)

    Faith, Make sure Nico is a NAKED masuesse. It’s really the only kind to have! ;o)

  19. pomegranites are delish. [sorry to be so behind on the thread but i felt i just had to add that last tidbit like a child about to wet herself jumping up and down hand outstretched and one clasping her nooner saying “teacher! teacher! i really gotta GO!” going being what i shall do now…]

  20. Can we do one for best Blogger who cheated on her husband all over the internet and then blamed him for the divorce? Um….

    LMAO!!! I *just* remembered that! HAH!

    Good one!

  21. uh huh. for the best Blogger who cheated on her husband all over the internet and then blamed him for the divorce? category, i nominate amber eden. oh wait, she don’t have a blog, or a domain..

    and for the the blogger that the best blogger who cheated on her hsuband all over the internet and then blamed him for the divorce was cheating with category, i nominate loony.

    i’m not so nice all the time.

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