WHUZZUP!

Guys… I’m all choked up. Thanks.

Apparently “The Web Celeb Groupie” wasn’t amused at my List, in order to fit in with the weblog community. So he drags this out to MetaFilter in order to show “the posting is about people who attack others on the web as a way to gain attention….”.

How noble, Joe. Too bad you weren’t fooling anyone.

By the time I got there, there were at least seven posts exposing his hypocrisy and defending me. These are true friends and I love you guys for this….

I’m doing this for attention???? I don’t think so. No one knew about WHUZZUP! When I wrote this about you… or this last month (which was removed at the request of someone visiting my site…YOU REALLY DON’T WANT TO KNOW WHAT I SAID THERE….)

It’s not attention. I just call things like I see ’em. I say things that most people want to say but afraid to….

Don’t like what I say? Don’t come here!

A little background history for everyone: I applied for the “i2k” button. Silly me thought I was a personal site that created content and qualified. I was rejected. A large source of bitterness for me as I didn’t understand this button was only for the “Elite ONLY” (and everyone wonders why there’s such bitterness toward the “Web Elite”… A shame because folks like Zeldman and Powazek are really good people when you talk to them on a personal level.)

There’s a lot of things you can say to me….

But never EVER say I’m “not good enough”.

You can resume your daily ass-kissing schedule now…. I’m done.

WalkingBitch’s White Trash Diner – Now this is how it’s done folks! LMAO!!! Consider this site bookmarked. And a happy belated birthday to you ….

Torrez.Org – Another hysterical blog. There ya go, bro!

The following links courtesy of THE coSmic diVa‘s world. They are *so much cooler* than these blogging dorks I’m trying so hard to impress….

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And to my friends…
Matt Rossi (On Emperor Ming defeating Flash Gordon and conquering the earth) “…And would Dr. Fu Manchu have stood by while some alien parody of himself menaced his world?“.

Dude, are you AWARE of how much of a genius you are????

Jon and The Webmistress were the only two people who seemed to appreciate my spur-of-the-moment Haikuing abilities. Jon is currently working on another Discussion Forum, looking for input…

The Webmistress feels I need to do more to fit in with the weblog community. Well, I have held these “generators” in contempt since I was told my color is “brown” (WTF is that supposed to mean??? I can only think of one thing that’s brown, and I ain’t talkin’ Chocolate! I wanted to be BLACK or BLUE even! Hell, I’d settle for RED!!!). No “Bond Girl Name” for me… and it’s been 3 days since they have indexed my site at that stupid “most linked” site and they still ain’t done….

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Fitting in with the Blog community

How about a “list”? They’re awfully popular…

Hmmmm… let’s see….

Why Doesn’t The CyberPal of Millions (or 400,000 in his first year) have an i2k button?

5. I was turned down because Coolstop feels that this site sucks.
4. Joe Jenett can’t stand me.
3. The feeling’s mutual.
2. Being the #3 Webbie World People’s Pick is reward enough for me.
1. If offered at this point.. I’d tell Mr. Jenett to SHOVE IT UP HIS ASS!

Wow… who’da thunk a day would come when Faith and Graham
would put their squabbling on the side, to give each other high fives
for taking turns kicking me in the nuts??!!?? So glad I could be of assistance,
ya jerks!

She’s also asking her readers “What they want to see more”.
I was very disappointed that “Boris doing some of the typing” wasn’t an option. Ctrl-Alt-Ego
could use something intelligent posted from time to time.

Uncle Joe makes mention of my “Class Clowns/ Village Idiot” piece. He seemed almost insulted. Dude, it was the whole cornerstone of your argument about how you need to play the role of Village Idiot to keep the serious folks at bay. It was somewhere around where you mentioned “there are jerks that I ignore on MetaFilter“… I asked Joe about that hysterical remark several times on MetaFilter, and he keeps forgetting to answer me (along with two emails)… It’s almost like I’m …one…of…those…peop..

oh.

But the cheapest shot of all came from Mr. Party Pooper himself:

“But the worst thing about the internet is that anyone can publish.“.

Three guesses where that link points to.

I am shocked hurt and dismayed that so many people would chose these un-provoked attacks against me?? (sniffle) Why me??? Why??!!?? (crying) What could I have possibly done??!!??
</Blatant attempt to become poster-child for “Blog Nicely IV“>

I’ll deal with you fuckers later I feel like a little positivity now…..

Pamster… For letting all her friends know about my Daily Carlinisms. A new quote every day by comedian George Carlin. Pamster has a really nice site with lots of stuff worth checking out….

Name The Diva Contest II

I hereby dub thee: The coSmic diVa…. (and don’t you let anyone make you drop that “V”!) You guys really need the “Vivaldi” font in your computer to appreciate how pretty this page is….

Danielle is feeling a bit left out. Truth be told, she was one of the ladies I was searching for when I mentioned all the Divas that had spoken out… but I couldn’t find her again. I was going to bill her as “Religious Diva“, for her many scripture quotes in her blog… but I know *I* would hate to be called “religious”, even though me and The Lord are like this… (well, you can’t see my fingers crossed together, can you?), as I love God and it’s “religion” that I don’t believe in….

I also understand she is offering a cash prize to the winner. :0)
(Sorry. The Devil made me do it. No prize money, but she’d love to hear from you anyway.)

Other suggested names I have come up with: “Doctor Diva”, “Christian Diva” and “Therapist Diva”. I had also thought a neat one would be “Faith Diva”… but we all know what happens when you take a name already used by a Diva….

Aw Man… I just don’t know when to quit while I’m ahead. :0)

Peep Washington, Jefferson and da rest of da boyz in an Independence Day Rap. Click on each founding father to let them throw down some phat lyrics too. (Flash required, y’all!)

• Now I can hold that venomous drivel you spew everywhere… against you for years to come...
  Now that we’ve exchanged icky pleasantries, can we pleeeeease resume that fun hate/hate relationship, so my wife’s friends can shut the fuck up, and stop putting ideas in her head (You had to be a redhead, didn’t you)??? I’ll continue to treat you with kid gloves, I promise.
• My turn to give advice to Netscape (make her a Diva already!) Diva: If you and Zero Cattle Diva can kindly go back and fine tune {insert name here}Diva‘s blog and remove that extra “/blog/” in her permalink, her enemies would *SO* appreciate it. It’s causing “404”s.
• Actually after checking my links I just read the news and make the correction Netscape (make her a Diva already!) Diva. Congratulations!!! In my few conversations with you, you have always shown the compassion, knowledge, and helpfulness that Leader Diva has envisioned her group to be. (They’re gonna take that the wrong way and kick my ass for it… watch.)
• Kitty Diva: Tres Kewl! When you make that a screensaver, I want it!!!!!
• My life as a weblogger has no meaning without the Evil Judge Wimp to kick around…
• Uh… Baylink? You know I love ya, right? Not in a “gay” way…more like a “prison” sort of way. Answer my fucking E-mail already!
• Finally… proof that even a broken watch is right every once in a while:
  “Don’t write something you can’t say to someone’s face….“

Has become a rant…and moved to SoApBoX…

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As seen on the web….

“<whine>
{insert really funny, yet true, shit here}
</whine>
{insert an even funnier (and even truer) commentary here}“

(Wiping tears from my eyes) Damn you for:

1. Making me laugh so fucking hard.
2. Not putting an anchor in so people will know what the hell I’m talking about two weeks from now.
   

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• Jazz Radio. Net – Streaming MP3’s. Great music.
• Tonya’s Cherub Heaven – Dedication to Amanda, Kevin, Craig – Last two weeks, I was in an “Evil” mood. This week It’s sadness. She set this site up to remember the three children she lost. For those mourning the loss of a “blogger” in the community, maybe it’s time you got a little perspective of what’s important in this world……

Dude, I’m all for the Motorcycle Outlaw Gang…. I nominate Don Bruns for membership for this inspiring piece on being a bastard:

• “But whenever I watch an amateur try to act mean, they just fuck it all up. No diabolical style, no fiendish glee, no mustache-twirling villainy. “
  – yep. He’s our guy!-

But I ain’t going nowhere without some Biker Chicks!!!!!.

This is something I feel I must clarify in the utmost expediency (look it up, you dorks).

No one has said this yet, I’m doing this on my own initiative. I’m reading the last few things I’ve written and I keep going on with the “Blog Nicely” bit. First of all my people (folks that have been with me through the beginning) have no idea what the hell I’m talking about at this moment. (More on that later….)

I’m talking about ThinkDink’s proposal of “Non-Negative Blogging“.

It sounds like I’m ridiculing this concept, and I’m joining the class clowns and drop-kicking it…. I’m not. I actually support Jessica’s initiative…as I find there are waaaaay too many sensitive souls out there that don’t understand this is a cold, cruel web… where your work is on a public forum. Always under a microscope, always ready to be criticized, one email away from you having a bad day…..

Believe it or not, I AM blogging nicely.

I continue to encourage and spotlight the work of my friends, offer kind words of encouragement. I’ll gladly tell Zippygirl that I find her entries very insightful; how Eric Ruhalter, The Webmistress and Cathie Walker are comedic geniuses; Tom Fulp is a genius PERIOD; Misty and Bonnie Burton are cuties; Amanda Formaro and Jeffrey Zeldman make great webzines, and how I appreciated Netscape (soon-to-be) Diva‘s tips on making my page work better on all platforms; encourage up and coming artists like Skizz, Aaron Cohen , and Warren “Texel” Ahner, not to mention all my friends from the “Internet Day” crowd….

However, when some guy that doesn’t know me, incites a riot, destroys all the evidence, and then starts saying shit about me that he should take a deep look inside and wonder who he’s really talking to… yeah, you’re gonna hear that too.

Then there’s obnoxious, overbearing bastards like Jon Sullivan and Matthew Rossi . Well, we got this “testosterone-charged” rivalry going on. Like we’re all sitting there on our Harleys, passing a 40-ounce beer to each other: “Here ya fucking dickhead!”, “Yeah, man…I love you too…asshole.” It’s a comedy act we’re fine-tuning on MetaFilter, and then taking on the road, starting with a three-week engagement at Lake Tahoe.

Basically, I perceive “Non-negative Blogging” as “Don’t dish it out if you can’t take it/Don’t dish it out to those who can’t take it.” I choose to feel people out and deal with them in the same way they deal with others.