WHUZZUP!

I’m not Luther

Posted on Saturday October 19, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

Not I’m not.
Nobody is Luther.
Sometimes *Luther* isn’t even Luther.

But I can sing, and sing I will.
For the first time in Lord knows how long I will be Karaoke-ing tonite.

Of course there will be anything on the list done by George Michael or a Brothers Gibb… maybe some Earth, Wind and Fire (the last time I did “Boogie Wonderland” I swear that damn song went on for an hour… had three rounds of applause as I kept sitting down, only to find out it was just a musical interlude….

How long is that damn song anyway??!!??)

Perhaps I can stick around long enough to do my national-anthem-that-I-have-yet-to sing, “Play That Funky Music White Boy“….

If I do “One In A Million You” again, I will get laid for sure…
Hopefully the Mrs. will be there to hear me sing it this time. :0)

Any requests?

Nico poses the following theory:
“people who talk the most about sex is the ones who has less of it. ”

*blinks. Looks around.*

Anyway, back to sex talk…

I do humbly apologize for the previous post. Could have been a great discussion about the Second Step Program… but instead I was sidetracked by the soft, juicy body radiant beauty of the young woman presenting it.

That was strange, like she was giving off pheremones, or something.

Probably one of three times in my life where I can actually taste my prey, and thought of nothing but pumping her silly I’ve gotten infatuated like that.

She did pay me extra attention though. I could ask the other daddies there if they sensed the same thing. I dunno, it was weird, and it seems to be reduced to masturbating over her only two times a day subsiding.

Eric Brooks

Second Step Program

Posted on Friday October 18, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

Forgive me, as this may take several drafts, I’m kind of distracted these days.

We had a function at the school on Wednesday, a spaghetti dinner for charity.

Mainly it was for a very young and attractive teacher to explain the Second Step Program. She seemed to pay extra attention to me during the dinner, and while giving the presentation, and it was hard to concentrate past her sparkling green eyes and her conservatively dressed, yet oh-so-gropable body.

What was I talking about? Oh yeah, the Second Step Program.
Anyway, I think it’s an interesting concept where kids are taught to resolve conflicts with empathy… basically getting inside the other person’s head and knowing how they feel. To systematically examine the problem and *both parties* work together to resolve it.

A lot of words were lost, as I was (as usual) doing another 48 hour day, and I could swear her blouse was unbuttoning by my sheer mental telepathy.

I can see this going one of two ways. I had a pretty fucked up childhood. I think most of us did, when you look back… being intimidated by bullies, made fun of, rejection, inadequacy…

Well, eye contact was out of the question… they were too dazzling, and the exploding peek-a-boo hooters forced me to keep drifting off into thoughts of fucking her brains out right there in front of the very uptight crowd… to I tried concentrating on what she said by watching her mouth. Those soft, moist, full lips, her eager… wet… mouth… just….

OH GOD… BRB!!!!

Okay, I’m back… where was I?
Oh yeah (I’m clear-headed now.)

I’m trying to imagine a world where kids are taught early on to resolve conflicts with cold reasoning, bullies putting themselves in the victim’s position and not picking on them anymore….

At face value, I think that’s awesome.

On the other hand, we ARE who we ARE, because of these traumatic childhood experiences.

Would I be as creative as I am now, if I didn’t retreat into a fantasy world as a kid?

Would I be as over-protective of my family as I am if I wasn’t fucked with and constantly tormented?

Would I be able to handle some of the situations I’ve been in with the same balls of steel if it *WEREN’T* for the trials by fire I had to endure early on?

I don’t know, I am so tossed up about this program. While every one is thinking about all the future Jeffrey Dahmers and D.C. Snipers being averted, I wonder how many kids will use the skill of “getting inside people’s heads” and becoming future Hannibal Lechters?

Everyone sees a future of peace and harmony, and I’m seeing a generation of wimps not knowing what to do during a terrorist attack or a hostile army taking over.

In the immortal words of Captain Kirk: “I NEED my pain.”
I need my creativity, my wits, & my borderline-insanity to survive.
I needed the events that shaped me into who I am… ‘cuz I kinda like me.

I dunno, somebody give me some perspective here… tell me what *YOU* think about the program. Considering homicide is the #2 cause of death of our 12 to 24 year olds… maybe teaching kids to control their impulses and emotions early on is a good thing. Maybe I’m not seeing the big picture here, or are these people just too optimistic as I feel there will *ALWAYS* be a predator somewhere in the shadows of our society???

I wonder if she’s listed in the phone book? :0)

Eric Brooks

Write, e, WRITE!!!!

Posted on Sunday October 13, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

Ok… let’s think of something profound here…

uhm…
uhm…

I heard the cutest thing the other day by my…
wait. court orders, can’t write about it. scratch that…

Uhm… today, I was playing with Visual Basic and I discovered you can convert…
Too boring. Who cares.

Making some great money, helping my …
Wait. That’ll piss her off. She doesn’t want to be mentioned on the web just yet.

I started working on the new designs for a…
top secret. can’t talk about it. damn.

I want to write about something that will captivate everyone… Something that will make you laugh, cry, think, talk about it, change your life.

Uhm… yeah.
And I will… you’ll see.

Yep.

Eric Brooks

Sure-fire lines

Posted on Wednesday October 9, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

Have a pest annoying you? Here are a few lines GUARANTEED to stop them in thier tracks…

Doting new parents that *constantly* urge you to hold their child/see pictures:“Awwwwww…. (s)he is TOO CUTE!”
“Adopted?”

People that hang over your food when you’re trying to eat:
“Eeeeew, I think someone’s trying to kill me! Try this. Does this taste like rat poison to you?”

Get rid of telemarketers:
People have it backwards. They try to get *off* the phone with these guys, when they are armed with a million responses to keep you on the phone.

Turn the tables on them by getting *REALLY* personal and chatty. Remember, they’re paid a commission for every lead they generate… if they see it’s going nowhere, and you keep directing the topic back to a pointless conversation… *THEY* will be the ones to try and get rid of *YOU*.

…. which unfortunately, is not covered in the training manual. :0)

Worst case scenario, is their supervisor will assume they’re goofing off and having a personal phone call and get fired. Of course you don’t want that to happen. Do you?

Sure-fire line to get you a seat on a bus or subway:
(Hover over intended target and say:) “I think I’m gonna throw up.”

You’re on the date from hell, it’s raining, she doesn’t want to get wet, and you want to end this…ASAP:“Awww, honey…. don’t worry. Only *sugar* melts in the rain.”
“Doo-doo kinda clumps together.”

Eric Brooks

Power and Stupidity…

Posted on Wednesday October 9, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

Yes… it is 4:45, and I’m about to go to sleep. (again)

I redid the door and window for poser, and I’ll send them out to everyone who asked tomorrow (or the next day, or…).

It was brought to my attention what I have known all along:
I am a moron.

See the “Subscribe for updates” box on the right? I was getting a complex because no one has signed up recently… fact is the damn thing hasn’t been working since the jump to undisturbed.org.

It works know…
If you signed up before, and haven’t had an update mailed to you in months… well, I lost your address during the move.

Why? Like I said, I’m a moron.

Well, no major news here… well it is major to me.
I registered to vote on the day of the deadline.

It will work like this… if you are an incumbent. I vote you out.
Simple as that.
I suddenly feel some sense of empowerment here. :0)

I think everyone who thinks that it all sucks, should just vote ’em all out and let fresh blood take over… I mean, how much worse can it get? Especially all of the local ones… *THEY’RE* the ones who effect your daily life more than a president or senator.

I know what you’re thinking… “e, that’s horrible…. putting people out of work like that, because you’re disenchanted with society????”

Folks… they’re not “people” okay? They’re politicians. It’s all showbiz. They’ll rape their own mothers and put it on videotape if it means getting your votes. They’re the lowest species on earth. Just below slugs, algae, and casting directors.

Do yourself a favor and boot them all out.
I’m looking forward to having an ex-judge ask me:
“Would you like fries with that, sir?”

hee hee!

Eric Brooks

Another day, another…

Posted on Monday October 7, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

Night without sleep.

I did another all-nighter….
(Memo2Me: The alarm clock is *NOT* a sign to go to bed!)

Besides catching up with work I didn’t get to finish over the weekend I was busy making Poser props.

1) A window that opens and closes, and a latch that locks & unlocks.
2) Door that opens and closes.

Drop me a line if you want me to email them to you.

Why do I do this to myself?????

*pops more vivarins and gets ready for work…*

Eric Brooks

Thoughts and prayers..

Posted on Sunday October 6, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

…going out to Lee and family in their time of loss and sadness.

Eric Brooks

God is Love… Man is (apparently) a moron

Posted on Friday October 4, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

From the “why-won’t-this-guy-just-shut-the-fuck-up???” files:

Thus sayeth Jerry Fallwell:
NEW YORK (AP) – The Rev. Jerry Falwell says ‘I think Muhammad was a terrorist’ in an interview to be broadcast Sunday on the CBS program “60 Minutes.”

Awwwww COME ONNNNnnnnnn!!!!!!!
Just when the world has finally gotten over his blaming gays, pagans, & feminists for being solely responsible for September 11st… his mouth runneth over again. I refuse to question what planet “Mr. Moral Majority” is living on, or how close his house is in proximity to the fumes of a crack factory.

Why do they give this guy airtime??!!???

“…’Jesus set the example for love, as did Moses,’ Falwell says. ‘I think Muhammad set an opposite example…’ “

Are we talking about the same Jesus and Moses here, Jerry?

Jesus who said:
“Do not suppose that I have come to bring peace to the earth. I did not come to bring peace, but a sword.”
(Matthew 10:34)

The same Jesus who opened up a can of whoop-ass on the Money Changers in the temple? Flipping their tables over, and going postal on them with a whip?
(Mark 11:15-19)

Moses? Who had to flee Egypt after killing a man, and hiding his body in the sand???
(Exodus 2:11-15)

I’m dangerous on the topic of religion, Jerry. Don’t screw with me.
Bad enough to add hypocrisy on top of stupidity.

There’s a time for peace, and there’s a time to kick someone’s ass (as Jesus and Moses has shown), and to now equate Islam with terrorism is like saying Christianity stands solely for hate groups like the KKK, and bombing abortion clinics.

See? They can say that about us Christians too.

Islam is not the enemy. Like any religion, Islam is about humanity’s quest to reach out to their Creator. There’s peace and there’s violence in it, just like Christianity and Judaism…

The enemies are the religious zealots (*ahem* stares at Fallwell…), who would take scripture and twist it to suit their agendas.

Eric Brooks

Obsession (My life in brief)…

Posted on Thursday October 3, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

Dammit to hell…
This program will work, I will not be sick, I will not die, and I will have yet another publication fully automated by Friday!!!!

I am so run down….

Running on one one less pint of blood doesn’t help either. Monday was the company blood drive & I forgot all about it until I saw my appointment card… no sleep, no food, give blood. Why not? Only 16 employees gave blood, and the woman coordinating it was begging us to stay committed.

What a difference from last year where I went to three places, and they either ran out of bags, or the line went around the block to a four hour wait…

My arm is all bruised and I look like a heroin addict. But hey…. I’m saving a life somewhere, and that’s always cool.

* Here’s the problem… I don’t bruise. I never bruise. And I sure as hell wouldn’t stay bruised three days later. Something is wrong with me, but I got no time for that right now… only the coroner will know for sure.

* Had a photo shoot on Tuesday, all attempts to download the damn picture has failed… that’s what I get for zipping and rushing up upload them to my private network folder… oh well, I’ll get them tomorrow.

* Searing mouth pain… years of grinding my teeth from stress, has caused me to lose most of my back molars. Every now and then, I find me pulling cracked pieces of teeth out with my bare hands, as the blinding pain makes be temporarily lose my concentration. Other pieces fall in to the crevices and get wedged into exposed nerves and cause abscesses. I usually unwedge them with a straw. (No one wants to drink from my soda after that, wonder why?) Now that I have medical coverage, time to see a dentist, no?

* Batgrl & Beckett are safely evacuated… Hurricane Lili has been downgraded to a Category 3 storm and is expected to hit Louisiana and Texas any minute now… good thoughts her way.

Uhm, where was I? Oh yeah…. CODING!
*back to ignoring all of you….*

Eric Brooks

Ugh… it’s that month again.

Posted on Tuesday October 1, 2002Friday June 3, 2011 by Eric Brooks

The unimaginable happens to me and those close to me every October. This is the month where the “worst case scenario” is almost a guarantee. Here in Anarchtica, it is to the benefit of all elected officials that statistics are in the extremes…

If you are in front of a judge this month, you are guaranteed to be incarcerated for even the tiniest of infractions. Prisons are filled to the brim this month, as judges, district attorneys, and anyone else up for re-election can boast of their “high conviction rates”, “low crime”, and how they’ve “taken criminals off the streets”.

You are nothing more than a sacrificial lamb for their statistics. You’re not quite innocent, but you are *definitely* not the hardened criminal they make you out to be. You are run through the system as “just a number”…

…and your family can’t do a damn thing about it.

Come November, the incumbents will win in a landslide…
Why? Because those living a trouble-free life will buy into this PR bullshit.

The recipients of this heavy-handed justice aren’t allowed near a voting booth for at least 60 days. Their family’s spirits are too broken to even consider voting these jokers out of office, though they should anyway.

Their voices will never be heard and their stories will never be told.
It’s a win-win situation for the truly corrupt.
It’s set up that way.

Not to worry. All is fine in my world…
At least that I know of. There’s nothing pending for any of us.

It was finished in my war last year, where losing meant “losing everything”. Victory over that war came at an unimaginable price to so many people around me.

Like I said, this is the month where the “inconceivable” happens.

There are still the bad guys, and old scores to settle. New plots of retaliation. I sit quietly in the darkness, with my glistening blade, and wait for them to come.

Welcome to my dark and scary world.

I approach October with baited breath, apprehension, and all the bitterness of days gone past.

I hate October.
But bring it on anyway.

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