Author: Eric Brooks

Web & Graphic Designer, Blogger, Musician, Evil Clown. I also code websites and promote people for a living. Still kind of a jerk, though. Approach with food.

My Little Princess

Posted on by Eric Brooks
Erika and me at 5 weeks old.You know I never believed in love at first sight
Until the day I first held you in my arms
Through the lightning storms I’d come to you
And I’d hold you tight
I vowed to keep you safe from any harm

And with a paper crown, you blew out your first candle
Such a lovely girl so different from the rest
And on that day I prayed you would always stay
My little princess…

I wrote that song when you were six months old, Erika. It was a rough and scary time for all of us as things were touch & go with you. A dumbass babysitter decided to give you a bath and left you in a room with a window open as your mom and I went out for dinner on a cold February night. We spent Valentine’s day in Schneider’s Children’s Hospital, after your tiny little heart and lungs were failing on you from pneumonia.
Continue reading “My Little Princess”

Dear UPS…

Posted on by Eric Brooks

Well, where do I begin?

I registered on your site, all for the sole purpose of changing the shipping address to a package that couldn’t be delivered to me. Why? Because the 800 number on my card isn’t accepting any phone calls due to high volume.

After registering, I was offered an impressive and wide range of options. I now know the names of all the people who have handled the package, their GPA averages in school and their full sexual history. I was able to do everything except what I set out to do, which was change my damn mailing address. I found extensive details on how to go about doing this, except these links and buttons in the instructions were non-existant.

Once upon a time, I thought I was a fairly intelligent person.
Thanks for straightening me out on that misconception.

-=e=-

Merry Christmas everyone!

Posted on by Eric Brooks

Hey, just want to wish my friends all the very best today!

*~Merry Christmas ~*

And if you don’t celebrate Christmas, I wish you the very best of whatever brings you joy, love and peace this season.

Try and hold on the the magic and wonder you had as a child at this time and never let it go! That’s when the truly miraculous happens. Close your eyes, let go and just… believe. If even for a short time today. 😀

*PEACE*
-=e=-

Updated12/26/05 – Happy Hanukkah and Happy Kwanzaa to all my friends who celebrate this today. I also thank you from the bottom of my heart for you being kind enough to hold off your holiday this year until Christmas was over so Bill O’Reilly and his anti-semitic ass would have one less thing to bitch about with his “War On Christmas” hysteria. 🙂

Judge rules against ‘intelligent design’

Posted on by Eric Brooks

‘Religious alternative’ to evolution cannot be taught in public school classes

HARRISBURG, Pa. – “Intelligent design” is “a religious alternative masquerading as a scientific theory” and cannot be mentioned in biology classes in a Pennsylvania public school district, a federal judge said Tuesday, ruling in one of the biggest courtroom clashes on evolution since the 1925 Scopes trial.

Dover Area School Board members violated the Constitution when they ordered that its biology curriculum must include the notion that life on Earth was produced by an unidentified intelligent cause, U.S. District Judge John E. Jones III said.

“We find that the secular purposes claimed by the Board amount to a pretext for the Board’s real purpose, which was to promote religion in the public school classroom,” he wrote in his 139-page opinion.

I’m sure all the atheists are jumping for joy right now. As a person who happens to believe in God AND Evolution, can I say something?

I wholeheartedly agree with this judge’s decision. This “Intelligent Design” garbage was merely a repackaged form of “Creationism”. It accepts the (two!) Biblical accounts of Creation without question, and with no scientific basis to back it up.
Continue reading “Judge rules against ‘intelligent design’”

The Broken Lion

Posted on by Eric Brooks

Years of captivity tried to break the once-proud lion.
But when he closed his eyes at night, he entered a world of his own making.
He was no longer in his cage as he blissfully dreamt.
He was home once more, happily ruling his kingdom in the warm sun, or he imagined his escape.

One night, by chance, his cage was opened.
As he wandered out to breathe free air once more, he realized it was too late for him.
His home, his friends and all his loved ones were long gone.
The cold steely city around him wasn’t freedom… it was merely a larger cage.

And he never felt as alone as he did that moment.

He bowed his head in sadness and resignation,
And found his place back in his cage with regal dignity
As he closed his eyes for the final time, and drifted off into oblivion…
… he was finally free at last.

Each day is a curse.
Freedom is merely a state of mind.

The Ultimate Super Model

Posted on by Eric Brooks

Problem Adults Well, unless you have been living under a rock since May, you know that Problem Adults  is the place to be! Anyone who’s ANYONE is there (or been kicked out for one reason or another… we’re kinda picky and sorta snobby, you know.).

I said I wanted to bring back the Z-List, and I like to think I did, only bigger and badder. This time catering to more than just bloggers, we got designers, webhosts, 3d artists, famous rockstars, movie stars and more!

Plus a state-of-the-art arcade and chat rooms!

The Mighty ~T~ has been keeping everything running, the lovely and talented Raven and myself working on the “HOLI-DAZE” Christmas layout, Kate the Head Elf taking requests for letters from the North Pole, and well, MissD making the chat rooms sizzle, and Jeanna is just plain HOT!

We’re more than just a message board… we one big dysfunctional cyber-family!

So, speaking of the “HOLI-DAZE” layout, it needed some extra OOMPH. So I recruited my lovely cyber-sidekick and this site’s spokesmodel, Randi into the mix. Who else can ring in our grand Holiday celebration, besides the ULTIMATE Super Model? 😀

Randi Xxxmas

Gawd damn… is she HOT or what???

Spamming spammers and the spam that they spam me with

Posted on by Eric Brooks

You know. Maybe if I didn’t spend hours cleaning up all the comment spam on this site, I’d actually have time to post something here for my tens of ones of fans here.

When you’ve had a blog since 1998 (oh yeah baby, a YEAR before Blogger came out, I’m ahead of my time!) you have a BONANZA of places to leave comments if you’re a spammer.

Oh, and by the way. I hate comments. I think they’re the WORST thing to happen to blogs. Instead of someone commenting on something I said here on THEIR blog (thereby their readers come here…) now, they come here comment and that’s that. Where’s the community now???

I’m noticing a trend. They seem to home in on select posts as obviously the spambots know it’s a safe place to leave their crap.

So now I lock each post as they come in. (HA HA! *Gives the spammers the finger in defiance*)
The spam is *already* dying down.

If there is anyone who knows how to beat ANYONE at their own game…
… it’s me. 😀

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Disclaimer: The views expressed herein are solely those of Eric Brooks. They do not necessarily reflect those of his employers, friends, contacts, family, or even his pets (though my cat, Puddy, seems to agree with me on many key issues.). In accordance to my terms of use, you hereby acknowledge my right to psychoanalyze you, practice accupuncture, and mock you incessantly with every visit. As the user, you also acknowledge that the author has been legally declared a "Problem Adult" by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, and is therefore not responsible for any of his actions. ALSO, the political views and products advertised on this site may/may not reflect the views of Puddy or myself, so please don't take them as an endorsement. We just need to eat.

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