Patriots Day

Gonna be back-to-back-to-back posts today, so much stuff is going on (and yes… the pilot episode of Super Dudes is done and online. Link to follow.)

God Bless the troopsDaphne reminds us today is Patriots Day.

You know, anyone can cheer on the winning team, root for the home team in an “easy war”. When the going gets tough? When things go really wrong? That’s when you see what people are made of. Our troops need our support more than ever.

Whether Saddam and Oday Hussein are hiding on a farm dressed as peasants somewhere, or they’re primordial ooze underneath a pile of rubble… either way, they’ll never be a threat to anyone again. No one will shed a tear for them, least of all me.

Where are all the holy men? You know the ones who scream “Death to America” everytime their coffee is too cold, or their eggs are too runny? Why aren’t they putting out a plea to the Iraqi looters and say “Hey, stop stealing other people’s shit, and destroying 7,000 years of history and artifacts!” ?

Just something new to blame America for.
It’s always America’s fault over there, isn’t it.
When the U.N. sends peace-keeping troops to some hotspot on the planet, they only see it as “The Americans interfering again.”

So now, on top of dealing with mercs, suicide bombers, and snipers, they’re expected to stop people FROM stealing their own shit? Give me a fucking break. Sorry we’re more concerned with combat and finding our people who are being tortured somewhere. Amid the gunfire and chaos, these ingrates are whining “this is democracy???”. What, they don’t have the balls to stop the looters themselves?
Continue reading “Patriots Day”

Tina’s movin’ on up…

Anyone looking for The Other Cheek can find Tina at her new fancy URL: www.othercheek.net… lookin’ good, sis! 🙂

I just finished the last two panels of “The Super Dudes” (no, I didn’t forget… just no time with all this War Coverage I’m doing.)

God Bless the troops
I learned something new in the newspaper biz lately. You would think something monumental like a war would be good for us, right?

Wrong.
While circulation goes up, advertisers pull their ads faster than you can say “Saddam Sucks”. Within hours before the deadline for Saddam to go INTO exile, advertisers were calling in to pull their ads. Customers see advertisers as ghouls at times like these, trying to cash in on a tragedy. (They get angry letters like “How dare you sell cars/cell phones/houses while people are dying???” )

Why do you think September 11th coverage went commercial-free after a while? Public service FROM the tv stations, or all the advertisers pulled their ads? You tell me.
Continue reading “Tina’s movin’ on up…”

Please adjust your bookmarks, and vote, damn you…

Kira, the Desert Flower has moved. Got a sharp new design, and went back to her old monniker of “Drawn Outside The Lines”.
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Kim, everyone’s favorite tough-as-nails survivor has moved The SICK SIDE to her new home at Serenity-Quest.
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My co-worker, Brian Burbank, has a thread going on his message board: “Lines FROM Dumb & Dumber”… flex your trivia muscles and add some quotes FROM the movie, will ya?
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As you can see on the right… my “Testimonials” are in full swing. A new one every time you refresh the page.

I need more testimonials!!!!
How have I changed your life?
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Cheyenne is losing at the Nude Bloggie Awards. Voting ends Sunday. She has vowed to carry out her threat to go with less T&A… AND MORE BARNEY!!!

Folks… I don’t even consider that funny.
Don’t do this to me and all the other horny hetero guys on the net…. VOTE FOR GNOME-GIRL!!!!
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**// Oh well, there was a long diatribe here about us guys and our preoccupation with our peckers, how most household items are phallic symbols, and how our next president needs to have a REALLY BIG DICK (I’m talking Vin Diesel/Milton Berle caliber here… before our next military action is called “Operation: Penis Envy”). But alas it is gone now.

Probably for the best… the thought of me and my big lips being someone’s bitch in a federal penitentiary is just too much for me to handle. //**

You’re still here…???

Yeesh… my attempts to be boring and neglect everyone isn’t working.
Must try to bore you harder. (Take that any way you want.)

Well, since I’m still deep INTO a bunch of projects (one is a superhero cartoon short I hope you’ll like.) In the meantime, let me direct you to some more entertaining places in CyberTown….

Have you guys met Jet and her husband Speedbump?
They’re friends of The Mighty “T”… so that makes them friends of mine (If I know what’s good for me!) :0)

They’re a fun bunch. Jet just wrote her account on the private little war us parents face in America.

Speedbump is hilarious… his antics remind me a lot of my own, and we should run a contest to see who spends more time on the couch after pissing the Mrs. off. Some of the stuff Jet writes about him reminds me of what Carole would write about me if she were blogging…

Of course if Carole had legs like Jet…
I wouldn’t be … uhm, … uh…

I forgot what I was going to say. Go pay them a visit.

Damn…

I am so sorry guys.

(Please respect their wishes and DON’T leave a comment on their site…)

It’s a time for them to grieve, be angry over something that will never have a sensible reason for happening, and have some time alone.

Believe me, I know. :0(
But at least I still know the feeling of parenthood… I can’t even begin to imagine their pain.

Parrot Joke War!

Leeeeeet’s get reaaaaaady to RUUUUUUUUUUMMMMMMM {SQUAWK!} BBBBLLLLLLLEEEEEE!

How in the hell did this joke elude Solonor and his evil henchpeople (even Planned Parrothood)?
It’s a fourth-grade classic….

KARATE PARROT
A little boy brings his parrot in school for “show & tell”.
“My parrot knows karate, he is a black belt in several forms of martial arts… watch”

The little boy orders his parrot: “KARATE THE DESK!”
The teacher jumps back as the tiny parrot squawks “Hiiiiiii-ya!” and karate-chops her desk in half with one mighty blow with his wing.

“KARATE THE BLACKBOARD!”
The slate blackboard shatters in a million pieces with one kick.

The principal storms in FROM the noise and the kids screaming in jubilation, demanding an explaination.

As the frightened teacher fills him in, the principal exclaims:
“Oh… KARATE, MY ASS!!!!”

bAA-DUM-PAH!!!!

Ok… I’m done.

No more doom and gloom.

Some people got what I was trying to say, some people didn’t.
A lot of us are just too damn frustrated to express mysel… uhm, I mean “ourselves” correctly.

Time to get goofy again, and fast.

…. and I will.
…….. any second now.

Is it 2004 yet?

**// Edited 8:48 PM //**
Well, I guess I can start by apologizing to Aaron for being an asshole to him last week. You’d think a guy who continually gets a bad rap for being a bully, would know better that to pass the same judgement on someone else…

But hey, a lot of great discussion was sparked on a few sites over the war (sorta) because of his post. It let us get out a lot of anxiety and jitters over it.

So, getting that off my chest… I am ready to get goofy again.
right now…
uhm… here we go…
yeah.

All hail the Queens of comedy

I almost got political today. I’ve had my fill of so much bullshit today, that I want to scream, and *almost* get political. I will say this much, though:

Despite my many complaints, and unhappiness at the current state of affairs… I still love being an American and can’t think of a better place to be. The United States of America still remains the greatest country on the planet, and if anyone has a problem with that, feel free to leave.

… the planet, that is.
The Challenger II is almost gassed up, and now boarding at terminal 5.

I crave humor and levity now… and some ladies on the web delivered.
This town needs an enema!!!

A message FROM the lovely Robyn: “I’ve run INTO quite a few people .. and blogs .. that could use one of these today. Their shit is so backed up, their eyeballs are floating.

So feel free to take one down, pass it around. Call it the gift that keeps on giving, and giving, and giving… ”

  • Maria treats us guys to a shot of her p**sy!!!
  • Next up is a new segment to give Lisa Whirrett a run for her money. I shall call them “Anne-isms“:
    Ladies – just because you’ve destroyed your own sense of smell, doesn’t mean you have to destroy mine. … stop buying that cheap-ass ‘Eau de Parisian Whore on Crack’ scent FROM the dollar store! “ok… one more:

    “Thank God there’s no ‘People for the Ethical Treatment of Clueless Men’ Society. Wouldn’t that just frizz the short and curlies and ruin an otherwise eventful day.”

  • Bran gives new meaning to the word, uhm, “Boar’s Head
  • *lights a cigarette*
    So, was it good for you, too?

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