Not getting involved (or aggravating yourself) with all the screwed up people on the web is the true key to an enjoyable online experience.
Life’s too short, and some people aren’t worth it.
Category: Attention Trolls™
People that just can’t seem to take enough punishment from me. They must be masochists.
Why I’m such a jerk.
I’m not only a jerk, but I’m damn good at it.
Hell, I’m better at it than you’ll EVER be, BAY-BEEE. Wait, better yet, I’m on a professional level of jerkiness!!! Batgrl didn’t knickname me The Vortex Of Mischief™ for nothing, ya know.
Continue reading “Why I’m such a jerk.”
International Heckling Day
Yes. “HECKLING DAY” is finally here, kiddies! Nothing spreads lots of cheer, readership and lotsa hits like a good meme. Here is your chance to hit comments all over CyberTown and cause chaos and mayhem wherever you go… and drive your hit counters through the roof.
What is heckling day?
What, are you stupid or something? What part of “Heckling” + “Day” don’t you understand?
Continue reading “International Heckling Day”
Ding Dong the monkey’s dead…
The World According To Me.Com (aka the “404 page”)
2000 – 2003 Rest In Pieces
Feel free to laugh, gloat and wait for “The Got-no-site-ed One” to whine and grovel at the feet of the Hidden Cabal of Those Who Run The Web (although we don’t exist) for mercy.
In this community, if you mess with one… you mess with us all.
Some lessons need to be learned the hard way. Like “Freedom Of Speech” requires a little bit of responsibility. Like HAVING your webhost pull the plug on your site as you are in violation of their Terms Of Service (not limited to “slander and libel”, “death threats”, “menacing and harrassment”).
*Does the heinie dance of victory* This community truly doth rock!
Thanks everyone!!!!
Open Season: One Week Later
Well, it appears TGO aka King Stormtrooper has done my bidding once again, and took down his messageboard. LOL! (I SO own this creep.)
It was pretty sad to see him there all day long, covering his board, like a kid guarding his tree house with water balloons trying to repel invaders. A lot of big-name people are involved in Operation: Not In My Backyard. I thank EVERYONE FROM the bottom of my heart.
Continue reading “Open Season: One Week Later”
Newz & Gossip
It’s probably too late to mention this, but if you’re planning on coming up for The Pocono 500, don’t bother. It’s raining really bad and everything has been cancelled until probably Monday.
To the NASCAR fans who are already here, I have been asked to kindly remind you to keep your campers, pickup trucks, and motor homes as far off to the side of the road as possible… and please place all of your empty beer cans in the proper receptacles. Don’t think of the rain as an obstacle… but rather as an unexpected opportunity to bathe this week.
Thank you.
You see, when you are up against an opponent who dismisses you rather than addresses the issues, reasoning with them is rather pointless. The winner in this game will not be determined by who’s right, but rather by who gets in the last word, and which one runs away crying like a little bitch. Oh no. This requires a special blend of guerilla warfare not seen since the bloody days of UseNet.
So please take the following tips FROM your Friendly Neighborhood WarMeister™:
- Be anonymous
- Get down & dirty (10 extra bonus points for any personal references)
- Drown the ignorant prick with noise
- Chaos and confusion reign supreme
- Tell all your friends
Kindly read the previous post before giving me your “bad karma” bullshit. The high holy Imam Eric® has declared a Fatwa (holy war), and bad karma will come to those who sit idly by as good people in our community are abused by cruel outsiders.
Thank you. Remember to tip your waitress on the way out.
It must be summertime…
It must be the warm weather which wakes the neanderthals out of hibernation, as they come dragging their knuckles out of their caves and in our faces.
Yeah, I’m referring to Kat’s tormentor. That asshole, TGO. (I think it either stands for “Totally Gutless One” or “The Gay Orifice”, who knows.)
Nothing spells “pathetic loser” like a guy that has to fabricate his own hate mail, or have a forum where he starts topic after topic that no one bothers to read, much less give a shit about. He claims to have this army of fans. I believe if there were such people retarded enough to adore this mental midget, they’d all be illiterate, and stumbling on big words like “the” or “dog”.
I feel for ya, TGO. Adoring fans with a second grade reading level make for a shitty fan base on the web. (If I’m losing you here, I CAN type slower.) Personally, I think if you don’t count your right hand, your so-called “army of fans” would total to exactly ZERO. Yeah, I got you pegged, asshat.
I think we should kick off the summer festivities by declaring open season on this asshole for torturing a woman who’s already in a great deal of pain.
Sure it’s like shooting fish duct-taped to the wall at point-blank range, but I have nothing better to do. And I really need his three hits a day, and all the anonymous posts this lamer is going to try and pull. Though I really doubt Turd Grabbing Oddball has the balls to take on an able-bodied man, that will probably put a size-11 foot up his ass if I’m ever down his way on business.
He calls it “Freedom of Speech”, where I come FROM it’s called “Harrassment and Menacing”.
He’s a funny guy.
But looks aren’t everything.
Memes and morons
Say it with me, people: It was a stupid stuffed bunny, and nobody cares any more.
This is a classic case of at least three sides of a story. There’s person #1 who started a meme, person #2 who is now convinced that they are this horrible person that everyone is mad at…
And there’s my side of the story. Which, as always, is known as the “gospel truth”.
While, yes, it seems at face value that there’s no excuse for person #2 to still be holding on to a passing meme… and the selfish morons are bitching to person #1 about it.
Well, I happen to know that person #2’s life happens to be in shambles right now (it’s not my story to tell, but it’s pretty bad). Perhaps mailing this retarded stuffed animal isn’t top priority in their mind right now. Ya think?
Of course, you can count on the web to be totally devoid of compassion, or sympathy, or even cutting someone a little slack.
Continue reading “Memes and morons”
A bright side to the economy…
This topic is closed… I’ve decided it’s not worth talking about anymore.
We’ll resume the “light & fluffy” topics and the no-brainers like “how much of a bigot is trent lott”, or “how much of a poon hound was clinton”, or “how bad can bush butcher the english language” at a later date.
Real issues have no place here on this site. I thought after I was in the clear, and was able to stop talking in riddles, people would understand the whole CPS situation in this country.
Instead, I find myself looking at rape victims, driven to tears, insisting that they “didn’t ask for it” to a skeptical crowd with raised eyebrows… and me sympathizing with their frustration.
Maybe I’m still not talking clearly. I don’t know. Screw it.
But I can’t waste any more time on a subject no one is interested in.
For those who missed it, I gave the Democrats a swift kick in the balls, and talked about stuff. I *WAS* going to discuss the May 20th Primary here in the Poconos, and the (even higher) importance of local government in our lives… but that has no place here.
Yeah. Ok. Light & fluffy coming up.
I’m not blogging about you. Really.
“…hopelessly in love with Eric (though goodness knows why, I mean, been there, done that, and well, let’s just call it performance anxiety shall we). ”
-Faith –
Hah hahahahaha!!!! Oh man I feel sorry for that poor g…
*blink*
Heeeeeeyyyyyy??!!?!!
Continue reading “I’m not blogging about you. Really.”
