What's new at EricBrooks.Com plus news and gossip all over CyberTown
Inside my world of mayhem! I am a Problem Adult, what can I say?
Diz is back in town… and she’s come bearing gifts. She figures I need cheering up, and CyberTown is in desperate need of a few laughs…
For those who don’t hang on to every word I say, and commit it to memory (most likely for a future legal action, you dirty bums!), she is of course, referring to this post.
Continue reading “Don’t make me like you.”
Hey kiddies, it’s time for the Saturday Scruples!
To be honest, these “day of the week/questionnaire” things aren’t my bag, I usually enjoy going around reading the answers… Daphne always puts some good thoughts INTO these.
I also like to see people’s hypocrisy and laugh:
“OH BULLSHIT! You know damn well you would trample a wheelchair-bound midget with downs syndrome to get out of a flaming building if you had to… and you KNOW IT!!!”
Hypothetical questions are great that way.
Of course everyone KNOWS I would help that poor person get to safety at the risk of my own demise, RIGHT??? I mean it would be a waste to not have the little gimp to kick around and ridicule later.
(Note to self: Daphne’s not going to let me play anymore after that one. Watch. :0)
Continue reading “Saturday Scroopules”
Man… if I had one of those “I’m feeling…” buttons on my site, it would probably say “cheap & used” right now.
How are you supposed to feel when you make amends with someone, you write nice stuff about them, they write nice stuff about you (well, more like USE YOU as a cheap tool to keep people FROM dropping out their project like flies in a mass exodus…) have these hundreds of people come here overnight to read my post…
….and then they read the next one, which looks like a “pig party”, and makes them look like a REAL asshole?
Would YOU remove all that nice stuff that you wrote about ME, and declare it a “useless rant”?????
*sigh* THE TRUTH: It’s not for everyone, y’know.
Yes… ignore me now. I’ll go away.
*SNORT* Oh Yeah, like *THAT’S* ever worked before!
Continue reading “Bored Stupid”
Yoo hoo… can we talk?
On a serious tip. No more wisecracks on the subject. I have to realize that I play to a more global crowd. Not everyone thinks I’m funny. In the world’s defense, a lot of Americans think I’m a mean-sprited asshole too.
What started this was a remark I passed in my comments. It was a “racial/ethnic” slur directed at Mr. Razavi. No semantics, no excuses… WHAT I SAID WAS WRONG. Simple as that.
I am very sorry for hurting you, Sayed. And I mean it. I am very sorry for anyone who was offended by the remark, too. It was crude and insensitive.
What followed after that was a chain reaction of disasters on both sides. Events that we have *BOTH* admitted publicly we could have handled better. Exacerbated by caring friends on both sides who wanted to defend us.
We both lost our cool. While we can’t erase the past… we can only move forward INTO the future.
As I planned to resurrect this site over the summer, I VOWED that this kind of stuff was not going to happen anymore.
I wanted to come back and be a POSITIVE force in the community. At a time where people are being polarized and torn apart over a war that affected the entire planet… I wanted to help bring the web community back together, torn apart FROM all the debate and harsh words, and I wanted to work with the same people with the same mindset.
Continue reading “Web Skirmishes 101”
One quick thing… THE SUPER DUDES ARE NOW PLAYING ON NEWGROUNDS.COM.
Please spread the word and VOTE FOR ME! VOTE FOR ME! VOTE FOR ME!
(Yes, I’m in “total linkwhore” mode today, why do you ask?)
Continue reading “The reviews are in…”
Sorry dudes. Fell asleep the minute I got home, and never finished the Super Dudes. Had an Easter Egg Hunt at work today (no, really.) Found a couple of eggs with tootsie rolls, destroyed the newsroom, and even found an egg with a raffle ticket where I won $1. (Cash is ALWAYS an acceptable gift.)
This of course wiped me out. It takes a lot of energy to ransack your boss’ office. Goofing off in his IM, talking to his contacts, pretending to be him… all in the name of finding that one Easter Egg where you get the day off with pay.
Somebody else got it.
Bastard.
I’m flooded with memories of 1981 where we were caught in a riot in Central Park in NYC (anyone remember that?) We’re there on the Great Lawn for the Easter egg hunt. The imbeciles in charge were running late, so they decided (in their infinite wisdom) to start tossing Easter eggs out INTO the crowd, right off the truck.
Of COURSE we’re gonna beat the piss out of the smaller and weaker for their Easter Eggs! We’re New Yorkers, what do you expect?
My cousins and I are pounding on smaller kids, while getting punched in the face by their parents. I had to literally pull my mom, by her feet, out of a 30-person pileup…
Only to get home, and watch Channel 11 news portray us as a pack of animals in their footage! The nerve!!!! It was survival of the fittest that day.
EricBrooks.Com – Where we’ll kill you for your Easter Eggs!
Send someone a FREE Passover/Easter E-Card, and spread the news…
With the first Whuzzupdate! Newsletter being sent out the door 5 minutes ago… this site is now officially opened for business! (Anyone see the pretty new front page?)
Continue reading “The Freak SHOW Returns!”
Rewind the clock twenty years or so…
May 1983… You see a little -=e=- getting ready to graduate high school. The end of the year talent show, had me and a GROUP of guys FROM the school band calling ourselves “The Jazzy Gents” on stage…
The program had us doing a run of the mill, Glenn Miller “In the mood”-type jazz progression, the inner-city crowd, subjected to a rather lackluster night, restrained by an old-fashioned teacher running it, were finally content…
Suddenly, the music stopped.
The drummer breaks INTO a solo, followed by a modern drum beat. I played an all-too-familiar bass line… the crowd was on their feet.
We decided “Fuck it… we’re playing Billie Jean!!!”. If we were leaving the school, we were going out in style. Two break dancers joined us on either side, recreating “The Gloved One”s electrifying performance on “Motown 25”, just weeks earlier.
The crowd went fucking wild!
Yeah… we planned the rebellion all along. ;0)
It was as if a riot was going to break out at any second… the guys handling the lights decided to get extra creative, we were instrumental, so the audience sang every word to the #1 song in the country, danced in the aisles, despite the terrified teachers ordering everyone to stay seated. The steam coming out of the teacher’s ears, over the change in program, provided one hell of a smoke machine effect. :0)
The coordinator of the SHOW finally got tired of us defying her, the back stage crew ignoring her orders to close the curtains on us… she finally unplugged our amplifiers when we were halfway through “Beat it“.
Bitch.
As a child of the 80’s, I couldn’t think of anyone that *WASN’T* a Michael Jackson fan. Ever see the scene in “Beverly Hills Cop” where Eddie Murphy chuckles at the white couple with the Jheri Curls and the “Thriller” Jackets?.
That might as well had been me. I had my hair permed twice, and paid $150 bucks for a silk “Thriller” jacket in 1984 (shut up.). I’d get off of elevators in Manhattan to a chuckling receptionist watching me in their monitors: “Hey, your spins are really improving! *snicker*”
It was truly Michael Jackson’s world in those days. We were only living in it. Being born and raised in the entertainment biz, his music and moves were pure magic.
20 years later, I watched in horror at the price the man paid to become “The King of Pop” on 20/20 tonight.
He seemed more defensive about his plastic surgery, than his hanging an infant over a balcony in Germany. He twitches when his father is mentioned. And honestly thinks nothing is wrong with his kids saying they “have no mother”.
Most disturbing of all, is how he just doesn’t get how inapropriate his contact with children is… sleeping in his bed with him. Calling parents who have a problem with it “whacky”. (!!!)
I can’t even begin to figure out what has fucked him up. Was it the torment and abuse of his father? The fact that he never had a childhood? HAVING his head filled with Jehovah’s Witness doctrine? The fact that he’s spent his entire life in the spotlight, surrounded by people telling him anything he wanted to hear?
Is it all of the above?
Or is it a deliberate move to get back in the spotlight, as it’s the only life he’s ever known?
Ask anyone in the entertainment biz. There’s no such thing as “bad press”.
In other news, some guy named Phil Spector shot and killed a woman in his home.
Oh. I’m sorry… back to Michael Jackson and all his surgeries…
I can’t express the sadness and pity I have for the man these days.
Dear -e-:
This other person is being a mean, poopiehead liar! I hate him!!!
He tried to kill my daddy, and he has nuke-u-lar weapons.
I know he has the dang things because we sold them to him when he was fighting those icky Iranians (OOPS! I probably shouldn’t have written that.).
He’s got weapons of mass destruction, I know it!!!! How do I prove it???
George B., Jr.
Washington
Thank you all SOOOO much for all your help in putting together this week’s
“EVENT OF THE CENTURY“. Congratulations to everyone who either gave/got the finger. Out of all the people that deserved the finger… YOU were definitely one of them… [See all the winners]
*Time to dim the lights, put on the sappy music, and get preachy here.*
The problem with blogland (and webloggers in general) that annoys the hell out of me the most, is the “What about me” attitude. Everyone wants an award, everyone wants a pat on the back… but so few people want to do it in return.
We’re ALL trying to leave our mark out here. And it makes us feel good to see our name on another site, or someone to go “Hey, I noticed you.”
Besides this starting as a spoof, it became something more. Instead of people going “WHAT ABOUT ME???“, Lots of wonderful people went “What about him/her…?”
It was beautiful.
Zeldman didn’t reach the popularity he did by talking about himself all day… he did it by promoting others.
He shined a spotlight on so many people, they returned the favor, and the myriad of spotlights made him shine like a star. Kottke, Metafilter, Blogger…. how successful would they have been had Zeldman not mentioned it for all of us to see?
Now I met a ton of new friends, and a lot of great new sites (Like Sue Bailey, who is absolutely phenomenal… and I can’t believe I’m only hearing about her now.)
The final winners…
TRIAL BY FIRE (and other legal crap)
That one really touched me, as I saw he’s honoring a woman who is a cancer survivor…. so (as usual) I’ll break my own rules, and give Pete B. the Jack Dawson award for the line Rose gave him in “Titanic”…
HOLLYWOOD LOOKALIKES/ACTALIKES
The other winners….
PROBLEM ADULTS
Congratulations… thank you all for the fun of this runaway train wreck, making this special, and being a part of it… and taking NONE of it seriously.
So who’s coming to the East Coast Gathering in March?
-=e=-
Disclaimer: The views expressed herein are solely those of Eric Brooks. They do not necessarily reflect those of his employers, friends, contacts, family, or even his pets (though my cat, Puddy, seems to agree with me on many key issues.). In accordance to my terms of use, you hereby acknowledge my right to psychoanalyze you, practice accupuncture, and mock you incessantly with every visit. As the user, you also acknowledge that the author has been legally declared a "Problem Adult" by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, and is therefore not responsible for any of his actions. ALSO, the political views and products advertised on this site may/may not reflect the views of Puddy or myself, so please don't take them as an endorsement. We just need to eat.
