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Funny stuff. Duh.
Chicken Hawk Down – By Tom Tomorrow
Hee hee haw haw HAAAAAAA!!!!
*falls off chair*
(I’m ok.)
It seemed to have caused a stir a week or two back. (I’m late for the party again, what else is new. But Tom Tomorrow nailed in six panels what I have been trying to say for over a year.).
Continue reading “Why does this cartoon offend Warbloggers, anyway?”
Ahh… the people have spoken.
And they are truly idiots.
However, it’s all about choice. That’s what makes America great, right?
Even if dark days, a lot of despair, doom & gloom are ahead of us. And you just gave the enemies the keys to the kingdom. Hey, that’s cool.
You did your civic duty and got out there to vote, and I’m damn proud of you.
Continue reading “Election aftermath”
If this can make me laugh, even with the dismal weekend I had… it can cheer anyone up.
*looks at watch, wondering when all my “AOL Forwarding Friends” will start circulating this… and send me MORE crap in my inbox.*
Wanna play “Add a caption”?
… or is this one just TOO easy?
A couple of months ago, I posted “Clever comebacks you can use”. Based on simple remarks that slip out of my mouth on any ordinary day.
Since then, countless women across the globe were addressed with such lines as “What beautiful children you have. Adopted?”.
Here’s some new ones FROM the “I can’t believe you just said that” files. FROM my upcoming book: “Like Morton Downey Jr. (Except I’m still alive)” Feel free to use them in your comments next time some anonymous ballbuster decides to pay you a visit, or on your boss, or on your darling in-laws.
Continue reading “More witty comebacks”
Kinda gives “HULK SMASH!” a whole new meaning don’t it?
Rumor has it that body builders all over the U.K. are throwing away their anabolic steroids and will now switch to gamma radiation… hopefully before they suffer any more, uhm, damage to their bodies. Yeah that’s it.
(via .:Chapel Perilous:.)
I guess in light of tonight being the premiere of “The Hulk“, and inspired by many posts by pops on the subject…
Perhaps I should shamelessly re-plug my 3D flash movie:
The First Episode of The Super Dudes – “Incredible, Ain’t it?”
NOW PLAYING ON NEWGROUNDS.COM
Maybe with a big enough pep talk, I’ll get around to making the second installment, where Captain America talks to kids in an inner-city school about drugs?
No. Nothing is sacred to me. Why do you ask?
I see a very disturbing trend, and I feel it needs to be addressed immediately.
I’ve given this a lot of thought ever since I was fired an angry letter FROM Ida Slapter, of the activist GROUP Blondes Irritated by Members Bashing Others (B.I.M.B.O.), regarding a joke I cracked about blondes on this site.
Yeah… ok. Redheads are evil, Blondes are dumb, et cederin. I get it. Stereotypes.
I am a blond (or at least what’s left of my hair after 11 years of marriage to a “bottle redhead”). okay?
The stereotype of blondes being stupid. I hate it! I hate it SO MUCH!
Blonde Jokes offend the hell out of me. The punchlines are laced with so many big words… guess what, asshole?
I DON’T GET IT!!! THEY’RE NOT FUNNY!!!
(I should not have to break out a thesaurus to find out what a “Breathalyzer” is, you insensitive prick!)
Robyn has really brought this situation to a head, as she has kindly asked people to make more “Blonde-Friendly” buttons in their comments. I too have had the bitter experience of writing something, only to press a button that says “HIZAAT SO BIZZATCH”, only to see the window close, and my words gone for ever…
What if one day, someone posts the cure for cancer on a medical blog and that happens??? WHO’S GONNA SUFFER THEN, YOU CLEVER-ASS BIZZATCH???
Jewdez, also a blonde (but she went to collidge and speaks Latin so she’s REALLY smart), has taken this INTO consideration by putting very-detailed instructions inside parentheses (bracket-thingys)… I now have an increased 75% chance of getting a comment through on her site. The rest of you who continue to use hard-to-understand terms like “Hizzat so bizzatch”, “Expedite this profound soliloquy”, and “Submit”… suck my dick.
I propose the world employs more sensitivity to blondes by:
I mean, is it really too much to ask for, that MAYBE you can give us blondes the same consideration that you do OTHER special-interest groups? No one complains about waiting an extra half hour as a passenger is assisted in a wheelchair-accessible bus? (HUH-LOOOO??? They’re ALREADY on WHEELS?!?!?! Put straps on the back bumpers, and charge them half-price! Like, DUH!)
… or when they put braille on the buttons of drive-thru ATMs…
(Do I REALLY need to point out what I think is so WRONG and DISTURBING with that picture?)
We can ignore all the dumb handicapped people of the world… but blondes are all around you. And we have access to curling irons and staplers too. You better take a minute to think about that.
To SHOW I am VERY serious about this matter, I will throw in my full support to elect Dan Quayle as Pope in 2000! So there. How do you like them apples?
EricBrooks.Com® – Currently going back to school to become a veterinarian, ‘cuz he really loves children! *giggle*
But redheads REALLY are evil. It’s true.
Actually, this is a paid public service announcement to all married men:
Did you notice this week you were given an awfully large amount of money to take to work for “lunch” in the past few days? Have you noticed a similar pattern during her birthday? When your anniversary was coming up?
You were supposed to buy her a gift.
Yeah, I know she said: “Oh honey, I don’t want anything…really.”
(Please bookmark this entry next time you find yourself on the couch, and you don’t know why.)
EricBrooks.Com® – Giving it to you straight, because women punish us for not being mindreaders, you know. (Hey don’t look at me, I remembered… uhm… after the Salad Bar at Ruby Tuesdays!)
You guys are too cool.. thank you so much! 😀
Aaaaanyway…. don’t you all miss when the web was a fun and goofy place? Way back before all the “serious” people came and fucked it up with their seeeeeeerioussssss topics?
*rolls eyes and uses hands to mimic the chatterboxes.*
Bastards. I hate them all.
And I lied when I said I “cared what they were going though”, so nyah!
It’s never seemed to occur to the “fun-challenged”, that we all get on the web to *escape* the daily bullshit we have to deal with at work, home, or the welfare office.
I propose SPONTANEITY DAY
A day where we get spontaneous, and goofy and just do stuff… just because.
This will, of course, take time to plot and organize… and meticulous planning on all our parts.
I’ve learned FROM my mistakes. I hesitate to bring up the “Anarchy Club“, where all you little whiney bitches thought my rules in the charter were just a liiiiittle too rigid, or the “Non-Conformist Day” disaster when none of us could make up our mind on what us non-conformists should wear that day (goddamn it, why couldn’t we just dress in all black like all the other friggin non-conformists???)
Let’s plot out “Spontaneity Day” here in the comments. I need to know what types of spontaneous stuff you intend to do… and when.
Disclaimer: The views expressed herein are solely those of Eric Brooks. They do not necessarily reflect those of his employers, friends, contacts, family, or even his pets (though my cat, Puddy, seems to agree with me on many key issues.). In accordance to my terms of use, you hereby acknowledge my right to psychoanalyze you, practice accupuncture, and mock you incessantly with every visit. As the user, you also acknowledge that the author has been legally declared a "Problem Adult" by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, and is therefore not responsible for any of his actions. ALSO, the political views and products advertised on this site may/may not reflect the views of Puddy or myself, so please don't take them as an endorsement. We just need to eat.
