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This month’s newsletter has gone out the door.
So look for “[whuzzupdate] Sorry I made you an alcoholic, ma!“, somewhere in your inbox… buried under penis enlargers and generic viagra ads (someone trying to tell me something here?)
Mother’s Day Weekend IV: The moms strike back
Continue reading “Mother’s Day Weekend Pt. IV”
Actually, this is a paid public service announcement to all married men:
Did you notice this week you were given an awfully large amount of money to take to work for “lunch” in the past few days? Have you noticed a similar pattern during her birthday? When your anniversary was coming up?
You were supposed to buy her a gift.
Yeah, I know she said: “Oh honey, I don’t want anything…really.”
(Please bookmark this entry next time you find yourself on the couch, and you don’t know why.)
EricBrooks.Com® – Giving it to you straight, because women punish us for not being mindreaders, you know. (Hey don’t look at me, I remembered… uhm… after the Salad Bar at Ruby Tuesdays!)
One day isn’t enough… this year, we’re spending the weekend honoring those who have the toughest job on earth… Moms.
You’ve brought a life INTO the world, nurtured it, loved it, cried for it, and worried about it FROM day one… and will do so until you leave this world.
Of all the moms in the world, the single mom is probably the one I admire the most. There will be no husband there to serve her breakfast in bed, or buy an expensive gift, or take her out to dinner. No one to take the kids out so she can sleep late on “her day”… some may even have to go to work this weekend because they’re not only playing the role of mother *and* father, but they’re also the only source of income. They’re tough as nails, and their children will *always* come first.
Continue reading “Mother’s Day Weekend”
Wow… after reading John’s latest post, it sure flooded me with memories.
Truth be told, I’ve avoided Metafilter like the plague for some time, as it just seems to have become a pit of vipers over the years. People saying things to each other that you know they’d be swallowing their teeth in a real-life situation.
John’s noted how in a GROUP with 17151 members, I’m like old skewl, yet I’m still a Johnny-come-lately compared to him.
He wrote some nice things about me, and everyone takes John for granted so I’m gonna reciprocate:
John Namest – Observant and a cynical as they come. Hilarious poetry on demand. Willing to discuss politics with my boss to a standstill, while the rest of us wussed out. (I could have been fired… but it was a chance John was willing to take.) :0)
Continue reading “Mefi Re-visited”
One of these days I am going to learn that with people in the blog world, it’s all about them. We’re all here for your amusement.
Rather than deal with guilt over something you know is hurting your friends, you’ll take the easy way out and bury them. Sell them out even though you know damn well they once went to bat for you.
When some people try to something nice, since it didn’t apply to you… rather than do something similar (since you’ve noticed a need for a different group), it’s just easier to piss in someone’s sandbox and walk away laughing, isn’t it?
I can go on and on about the self-centered bullshit in this community that makes me sick to my stomach, but I’m aggravated enough. Oh right, let me guess what your cop-out answer is going to be… you’re only human, right?
Fuck! No wonder why I choose not to get involved with people in real life…
If the shoe fits… wear that bitch.
Excuse me while I go puke in your honor.
…the Dead: Jannelle’s Laptop hath been resurrected. Hallelujah!
…getting the crap bombed out of him: Salam Pax returned yesterday with a bunch of new posts composed on Word while the power was out in Baghdad.
(I don’t mean to be a jerk or nothing, I mean, he’s interesting reading and all, but am I the only one who has their “KayCee alarm™” going off when I hear his name?)
…the outer reaches of the Cosmos: That’s right, true believers. The man who taught me everything I know about finding new worlds and destroying everything in my path is now blogging… Yes, Galactus has a blog. (Figures he’d tell Solonor before telling me. Heh… and I don’t need no stinkin herald either!)
…blowing out candles: HAPPY BIRTHDAY MARIA!!!!!!
Yeah… that’s about it.
Anything else you think you saw in this entry, you’re sadly mistaken.
You guys are too cool.. thank you so much! 😀
Aaaaanyway…. don’t you all miss when the web was a fun and goofy place? Way back before all the “serious” people came and fucked it up with their seeeeeeerioussssss topics?
*rolls eyes and uses hands to mimic the chatterboxes.*
Bastards. I hate them all.
And I lied when I said I “cared what they were going though”, so nyah!
It’s never seemed to occur to the “fun-challenged”, that we all get on the web to *escape* the daily bullshit we have to deal with at work, home, or the welfare office.
I propose SPONTANEITY DAY
A day where we get spontaneous, and goofy and just do stuff… just because.
This will, of course, take time to plot and organize… and meticulous planning on all our parts.
I’ve learned FROM my mistakes. I hesitate to bring up the “Anarchy Club“, where all you little whiney bitches thought my rules in the charter were just a liiiiittle too rigid, or the “Non-Conformist Day” disaster when none of us could make up our mind on what us non-conformists should wear that day (goddamn it, why couldn’t we just dress in all black like all the other friggin non-conformists???)
Let’s plot out “Spontaneity Day” here in the comments. I need to know what types of spontaneous stuff you intend to do… and when.
Yessiree…. May 7th is ALWAYS a special day here!
On this day, Lee’s granddaughter blows out her very first birthday candle…
Dyane’s “baby” becomes a teenager….
And, well, not that I normally play favorites with my kids, but out of all my sons, he’s *definitely* my favorite…
… and, well, any of you wonderful folks that would like to brighten a little boy’s day in the comments here (he can read, you know)….
It took long enough, but I finally have something up in my links section. When I surf blogs, I’ll be coming through here… idiots that come there via their referrals will look REALLY stupid, and I will direct people to point and laugh at them.
I also need to add a “personal website” (you know, non-weblog?) section, as I’ve gotten emails FROM a lot of old friends that haven’t heard FROM me since my last newsletter in 2001… as well as “Celebrity” home pages, really cool famous people I’ve met either in person or through the web…
In tying all this together, I got a newsletter last night FROM the ever so stunning Lisa Whelchel, who has a new book on home schooling out.
So I write back, “Hey Lisa, remember me?”, and enclose the photo below. It’s when I met her back in May of ’83, at the place my friends and I lovingly refer to as “The Cult” (see?).
The only picture I have with her, and I look like a TOTAL FREAKIN’ DORK!!!! (What’s up with my teeth? And I think I’m caught here pick-pocketing what’s in her sweatjacket. I’m not sure.)
It is now dawning on me that this picture is FROM 20 years ago, this month… She’s still hot-looking, and I suddenly feel very old, and as dorky as ever.
Disclaimer: The views expressed herein are solely those of Eric Brooks. They do not necessarily reflect those of his employers, friends, contacts, family, or even his pets (though my cat, Puddy, seems to agree with me on many key issues.). In accordance to my terms of use, you hereby acknowledge my right to psychoanalyze you, practice accupuncture, and mock you incessantly with every visit. As the user, you also acknowledge that the author has been legally declared a "Problem Adult" by the Commonwealth of Pennsylvania, and is therefore not responsible for any of his actions. ALSO, the political views and products advertised on this site may/may not reflect the views of Puddy or myself, so please don't take them as an endorsement. We just need to eat.
